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About this blog

Ramblings of a bearded lady...

Entries in this blog

 

Bumped into Yoko in the cc!

And it reminded me of the good old days.   I remember the controversy when Yoko, Zelly and I got promoted so I went gravedigging and found it!   http://runescape.salmoneus.net/forums/topic/300594-yay-new-chat-mods/   Enjoy! :P

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Trying to watch 24

I never jumped on the bandwagon the first time it came on even though most of my friends did. I never liked getting into a series because it tied you down so you'd have to then be at home the same time every week to watch it (this was what 2000/2001 so I could have recorded it onto VHS but that was just hassle, and my dad always recorded over the tapes). Anyway saw it on Netflix and thought I'd give it a go. I've had to stop at about 11:00am series time as its just so boring and frustrating. The worst part? Knowing that there are still what 13 hours to go? Nothing they ever do goes smoothly and its just dragging it on a lot longer than it needs to.   So yeah, that's it.

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Have a Happy Period

Feminine Hygiene company’s hilarious response to Facebook comment accusing them of lying about “Happy Periods”     A few weeks ago, a now-wildly popular comment was left on the Facebook page of Bodyform, the British feminine hygiene arm of Swedish consumer goods company SCA, accusing the company of false advertisement. Richard Neill left the comment (pictured below). Neill’s totally sarcastic post has been liked over 80,000 times in just over a week, prompting Bodyform to release an equally hilarious tongue-in-cheek apology (in the video below) for its years of fabrications. “I think it’s time we came clean,” says “CEO” Caroline Williams. “We lied to you Richard, and I want to say sorry. Sorry.” This whole thing is hilarious! Enjoy.    

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Merch made me a birthday card!

She used this cat because I practically wet myself laughing the first time I saw it, and every time it gets reposted in some form or other on Reddit I just start laughing!   Thanks Merch!

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Styled by Paul

So I ended up on the Barbie website and I designed the "Paul" doll for MFI.       You can even get a doll T-shirt printed with your Barbie's name in comic sans!     Some other looks that can be achieved by your Barbies!       If anyone decides they are bored enough to have a go then click here!

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Thank You

So I do a little thing that makes me happy. You hold a door open for a stranger, or let them go first or any other act that would usually illicit a "thank you" from them, that makes you feel good in a samaritanny sort of way. When they don't say thanks, that's when the fun starts, I just say "you're welcome" regardless of if they say thank you or not, not rudely but really friendly like. Then I walk away. Totally obnoxious I know but its so much fun.   Today though someone actually said "what did you say?" in a quasi aggressive way after I'd done this. So I just said "oh I'm sorry, I thought you said 'thank you'" as innocently as I could muster.   So much fun!

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A Grave Error

I went to my great Aunt's funeral today. I've never been to a burial before, only ever cremations. She died a few weeks ago but it had been on the cards for a while, she'd just sort of stopped eating. She'd withered away to nothing, she'd just given up I think after my Great Uncle John had died. She used to be so full of life and such a funny character that In the end she just wasn't her any more.   The church service was really lovely, lots of singing and funny eulogies. Then the pall bearers came in and we followed them into the cemetery. Its an old cemetery and Dorothy nearly didn't make it in as they said there wasn't room. When we explained to them (when organising the funeral) how many of our relatives were buried there they relented and said we could use one of the few remaining spaces.   So picture us following this coffin, through 2 inches of snow and mud all dressed in mourning attire, skirts and suits in shades of black and grey. We get to the grave, the hole is dug and the edges of the pit and the pile of soil are covered in one of those pretend grass carpet thingies. I guess the carpet is an attempt to make the hole look nicer, but its still just a hole.   We gather round and the undertaker hands each of the ladies a yellow rose from one of the bouquets, I take mine and hold my Granny's hand, Dorothy was her older sister. The Vicar lady recites a prayer as they begin to lower the coffin into the grave. I say begin because it only gets about half way before they realise it doesn't quite fit. A few relatives begin to giggle a little, as quietly and respectfully as they can manage as the pall bearers sort of jiggle the straps they are using to lower my Great Aunty Dorothy into her grave trying the shuffle the coffin in.   After a few minutes of this they lift the coffin up again and put it back on its supports. the head undertaker puts his hat on and begins to walk away. "where's he going?" someone asks, "Maybe he's going to get a shovel?" says my Granny grinning. The pall bearers look very uncomfortable, trying to remain solemn as possible in the midst of people laughing saying that this was just like Dorothy and did anyone happened to have a spade handy? One relative asks if we can put the coffin in sideways but my granny mentions that Great Uncle Johns ashes are in there and if we put the coffin in sideways he'll spill. My uncle Russell starts looking under the green carpet over the pile of dirt to see if the grave digger has left the spade there for filling in the grave later. He has, and a fork too for good measure. The pall bearers continue to stand there, heads bowed occasionally sharing an uneasy look with one of their colleagues. I'm guessing this doesn't happen often.   A couple of minutes later the undertaker returns with the gravedigger in tow. They try taking off the carpet from one of the sides of the hole, to see if that'll help. After a few more minutes of shuffling and my Uncle Steve saying things like "looks like Dorothy did manage to put some weight on in the end" it looks like its still not going to fit, the grave isn't wide enough. So the poor grave digger grabs the spade and starts leaning into the grave to widen it. Eventually he has to jump into the grave to widen it lower down. So there we are 20 odd people in our best clothes, standing in the mud and the snow laughing at the absurdity of it all as we watch a poor man in a 6 foot hole digging a grave for our Aunty Dorothy. He's there for a while, digging away and people are telling stories, memories and anecdotes about funny things that Dorothy did when she was alive. Eventually he jumps out of the hole and they start lowering the coffin, the Vicar resumes her prayer and we all give a hearty cheer when Dorothy reaches the bottom. Everyone agreed that she'd find it all very amusing if she was watching, at least she's given us all one last memory of her to hang on to.   Eccentric to the end, that's my Aunty Dorothy.   of the last minute, Uncle Steve wanted to get a picture of the man in the hole.

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Blog Settings

Every time I try to change my blog settings it just takes me back to the community blog page without letting me see the settings screen.   Any ideas anyone?   Also, FYI I'm Aabid and so's my wife.

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Cleaning up Ke$ha on a Sunday morning.

So it started with this picture of Ke$ha popping up on my Youtube.     So I sent It to Paul asking why someone would use that as an advert.     So Paul did try, but he was having some trouble.     This as you can imagine spurred Paul on to try again, and this time he succeeded, but only because he replaced her eyes and mouth with Catherine Zeta Jones' and heavily blurred it. But, it still looks better than the original!       I eventually managed to get something looking half human and vaguely clean after using a lot of filters     So here is my challenge to you Sal's. Take this picture and actually try to make her look washed, brushed, polished and sober.   Good luck!

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NASA - Spot the station.

You can get email or SMS alerts from NASA when the space station will be over your house at a time for good viewing. So exciting!   Read more about it here.

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Runescape Sex Doll

Is it just me or is my character looking suspiciously like an out of proportion inflatable lover?  

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A wise decision?

I'm being put on a sedation course for work in November. They are putting me in charge of unconscious people.

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Off to the Olympics!

After work tomorrow I'm heading off to the Olympics! Rather excited! I'm volunteering at the stadium for a whole week and also at the closing ceremony. I'll mainly be checking tickets, welcoming people to the venue and ushering to seats.   Also get to work the closing ceremony and have tickets to go watch team GB play handball on Saturday morning.   So excited, no doubt I'll write about some stuff in here but as I'm sofa surfing for the week at mates who live in Londinium, dont expect to see too much of me.   Have a good one Salmons!

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Update on garage sleeping!

I lay down on a sun lounger and used a dust sheet for a blanket. God bored of that after a little snooze, bent some wire into a long arm hooky shape stuck my hand through the catflap and hooked the key out. Thus I had a lovely sleep in my own bed. YAY!

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Oh smashing

So I just got home to find that someone has locked all the doors and left the keys in them. Looks like I'm sleeping in the garage tonight. Oh joy.

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Dilemma

I'm so hot but if I open the window I'll get swarmed by moths. Which normally wouldn't bother me but last night they kept landing on my face when I was trying to sleep and it was really horrible.   Pointless blog entry I just wanted somewhere to moan.

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Nakey Tassets

Some people wanted to see what some new items looks like on women.   Nakey Tassets:     Agile:     Lemme know if there's any others you want to see.

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