I've made my decision. I'll be going somewhere far away and I won't be back. Well, if things work out the way they are supposed to, that is.
Thank you for all of the memories. I enjoyed my time on this site.
Wiltingplant--for being there for me when I needed you, despite the fact that the topic at hand wasn't always a comfortable one.
El Benno--PASTA! Good memories.
Vogrinjr--I bid you adieu, my faithful slave.
Newbownage/Xxrunezxx--although you don't come here anymore, we had fun times PKing.
Eberk--super skiller; had a blast competing with you when you were f2p.
Queen Missy--you don't come here anymore, but I feel like this is a good place to include you. World 62 buddy!
1800151100/Sketchy--you guys are gone, too, but we had fun hanging out (Xmas events were great!!). And leet times in Fear, Sketchy.
Yuan--we stopped talking long ago, but I've always respected you. Keep on truckin'.
Co-Z--lolVera. If you ever see this (although I doubt it since you're banned), I actually tried playing WoW!!! I quit after like 4 months and really only played for 2, but it's not a bad game.
Fraff--I miss stalking you on RS.
Bcloutier--don't know if you're still f2p, but had fun times RCing with ya.
Jgingrey--you disappeared?? Where art thou??
Sneezingtree--I will always remember you as p2p ownage.
Neko--Take me to japan.
Novemberain0 (don't know your name here now)--we chatted all the time. Had some great moments.
Metalkon--Blue party hat remembrance.
Pinky--made RS slightly more interesting with our convos. ;)
JustJoshin--same as above. ;)
Nicole/Lilmessedkid--thank you for trying to get my spirits up.
Common Sense--f2p memories!!
I hope I haven't forgotten anyone. And, of course, everyone else on this forum + Sal's CC.
A long, long time ago in a land far away,
There was a monster without a name.
The monster wanted a name badly.
So the monster left to go on a journey to find a name.
But the world was so large that he split into two to make his journey.
One went to the west and the other went to the east.
The monster who went to the east found a village.
At the entrance of the village, there was a blacksmith.
“Mr. Blacksmith, please give me your name.”
“You can’t give away your name.”
“If you give me your name, I’ll enter you and give you strength.”
“Really? If you can make me stronger, then I’ll give you my name.”
The monster entered the blacksmith.
The monster became Otto the Blacksmith.
Otto the Blacksmith became the strongest man in the village.
But one day he said,
“Look at me. Look at me. Look at how large the monster inside me has become.”
Crunch Crunch! Munch Munch! Chomp Chomp! Gulp!
The hungry monster ate Otto from the inside out.
The monster returned to being a nameless monster.
Even when he entered Hans the Shoemaker,
Crunch Crunch! Munch Munch! Chomp Chomp! Gulp!
He returned to being a nameless monster.
When he entered Thomas the Hunter,
Crunch Crunch! Munch Munch! Chomp Chomp! Gulp!
He once again returned to being a nameless monster.
Finally, the monster came to a castle looking for a wonderful name.
In the castle, there was a sick boy.
“If you give me your name, I’ll give you strength.”
“If you can cure this illness and make me strong, I’ll give you my name.”
The monster entered the boy.
The boy became well.
The king was so pleased. “The prince is well! The prince is well!”
The monster liked the boy’s name.
He also liked living in the castle.
So even though he was hungry, he endured.
Every day his stomach growled, but he endured it.
However, he was so hungry that one day he said,
“Look at me. Look at me. Look at how large the monster inside me has become.”
The boy ate the king and even his servants.
Crunch Crunch! Munch Munch! Chomp Chomp! Gulp!
Since there was no one there anymore, the boy went on a journey.
He kept on walking for days and days.
One day, the boy met the monster who travelled to the west.
“I have a name. It’s a wonderful name, too.”
The monster who went to the west said,
“I don’t need a name. I’m happy even without a name.
We just have to accept that we are monsters without a name.”
So the boy ate the monster who went to the west.
He finally had a name.
But all the people who could call him by that name had disappeared.
It's finally here. I finished my last finals yesterday and I'm just going to hope that I did well--especially in Physics. I'm going to pray that I got at least a 63 on the final. I'm happy that I'm done with the subject... for now, that is. I'm going to need three more semesters of specialized Physics later on, but let's not worry about that now, yeah?
I've also been calling up hospitals the last couple of weeks to see if they'd let me do my observation hours at their radiation therapy site. I need to do 40 hours by February (and I need two more letters of recommendation), so I'm sort of rushing to finish all of these by the end of summer because I probably won't have the time to do them in the fall. I didn't hear back from any of the hospitals, so I just decided to visit the nearest one to see if I could meet with the department chair in person. He wasn't there, but I got to talk with the (only) radiation therapist and he said he'd "open some doors" for me. I called him thirty minutes later to clarify some things because we had some misunderstandings, but apparently he doesn't remember me. Either that, or he gave me the wrong number. I really, really, hope it was the latter, but I dunno, it sure sounded like his voice. I guess I'll start asking some of the smaller clinics around here; the other hospitals are an hour away and I don't feel like driving that far.
Other than doing my hours, I was planning on visiting my dorms to see where it's located and to get a glimpse of what it looks like on the inside. That was the plan until I figured out that it wasn't even open during the summer months. The next time tours are available is during the fall, so that's a bit of a disappointment. I'm going to end up visiting anyway to get a feel of the general area (and so I don't get lost trying to find my way to school because I have no sense of direction). I've also talked to my roommate a few times and he seemed like a pretty cool guy. We have a lot of things in common so it looks like we'll get along fine.
Oh, and my financial aid problems resolved itself so I don't have to worry about that anymore.
Life's had its ups and downs lately, and unfortunately, right now I'm sort of stressed out on just about everything. The papers and midterms aside, I learned tonight that somehow my pending financial aid just upped and disappeared. I applied for it over two months ago and everything seemed OK then, but I have no clue what happened to it. So hopefully everything will be sorted out within the next couple of days... Or else I'm screwed kthxbai. And I can't get into the classes I need yet again, but I can't say I'm particularly surprised on this front. I knew I had zero chance of getting into Physiology, but man, it's just so depressing to see that you're like #30 something on the waiting list. I have back-ups and all, but I NEED this class. The other one I want isn't so bad--I'm #7 on the waiting list so I think I can get a spot. fdkjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj My brain is going to implode.
Well, on the bright side, I'm 19 now! I almost forgot about it since I was so busy with other things. Didn't do anything grand because I didn't have the time, but just gorging myself on an endless stream of dishes was certainly good enough for me. Oh, and we explored the new promenade that they attached to the local mall. The stores had a bunch of freebies and sales, but there weren't a lot of choices to choose from since most of the stores only sell female clothing... I did see a shop offering free shirts that didn't look like total crap, but I opted out of getting one after seeing 32342434 people waiting in the queue line. And I don't exactly want to be bashed to death by a stampede of dangerous-looking freeloaders. D:
And I saw Star Trek. In IMAX. And it was GLORIOUS. And so was Chris Pine--who is officially now my property. :)
I noticed at a very young age that I was attracted to men, not women. Well, except for that one time in which I just fell head-over-heels in "love" with this girl in 6th grade. She was attractive and smart, but I was only attracted to her emotionally. I wasn't into her sexually at all (but I did find her to be very good looking); all I wanted to do was be with her. I'd imagine holding her hand and giving her big, warm hugs, all of which would give me a flurry of butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it--you know, the typical embarrassing childhood crush. It lasted for a long two years, the longest crush I've ever had. I did call her once, but it turned out to be a disaster because I didn't know what to say. All we really said was "hello". After that, an awkward silence permeated the "conversation", and she finally hung up after about twenty seconds of no speaking. Yeah, I'd say I was devastated, but my attraction to her was indomitable. It stood strong until one day it just completely disappeared without warning. But before that, as much as I was attracted to her, I'd find myself being more and more attracted to the guys at my school. I wouldn't consider them crushes. Just physical attraction, pure and simple. It wasn't until many years later during my junior year in high school did I have my first male crush, and that only lasted for about two weeks. I found myself falling in "love" with another guy as a freshman in college, this time with me being both physically and emotionally attracted to him. This crush lasted throughout the semester and slowly fizzled out near the end. At this point, my attraction to females has all but waned. I mean, sometimes when I see a very attractive woman, I'd feel inexplicably drawn to her. This rarely happens, but when it does, I'd catch myself sneaking peeks at her out of the corner of my eye. But it has never progressed any further than that; I've never developed any feelings for any of these women. Apparently, these days, men are the only ones I'm interested in.
I've racked my mind over and over as to where I stand on my sexuality, but that's all in the past. It is meaningless to delve deeper into something so convoluted. I am attracted to whoever I'm attracted to, and I'm just going to leave it at that. That's why I don't particularly like placing myself in a specific category such as gay, bisexual, or straight. For the sake of simplicity, I always just say that I'm "not straight" because I don't fit into the other categories, and I'd rather not force myself into them. I don't believe that sexuality is black and white. It's very much a gray area, so compartmentalizing something that's already so complicated won't get anyone anywhere (especially for those who are questioning their sexuality); it'll only lead to more confusion.
My very first... CAR CRASH!
I'll spare you the details because it's complicated, but it was very minor. The car I hit looked like it had already been through hell and back (and I just happened to hit him where he had a pre-existing dent), so luckily no charges were incurred. There is, however, a small dent in the front bumper of my car now, along with a bunch of white paint surrounding the area. Not that I even like my car, but... it still, quite frankly, sucks. As much as I'd like it to disappear, there's no way I'm going to shell out $500 to get it fixed. So it's just going to stay there, looking pretty, forever and ever. By the time I graduate, my car will look like a piece of shizzle anyway with my shoddy driving skills, so there's no point in worrying about every little cosmetic detail, mirite?
On a more positive note... Spring break is here (albeit only for one college). Well, less work is always welcoming, especially now. I've been inundated with coursework over the past couple of weeks, and a break is something that I desperately need. It's great being able to finally let out a sigh of relief.
Okay, I took some pictures.
Behold, my car, the pinnacle of masculinity!
And here's the dented bumper. I must say that it looks a lot better in the pictures.
I should be sleeping right now, but I felt like blogging about something. Hopefully I won't end up falling asleep at my computer (again). I have a bad habit of doing that...
I recently ordered a video game (Persona 4 baby!) off Amazon. It was 30% off, and it came with an art book and part of the OST so I bought it on a whim. The package arrived much, much earlier than expected. It was supposed to come next week, but hey, I'm not complainin'. My weekend pretty much revolved around obesssively playing it. My homework plans were utterly destroyed and now I'm likely going to be behind in classes (for shame). My papers just keep piling up and up and up. But at least I have a shiny new toy to play with!
Speaking of classes, I get to drive to to college three days a week now. The other two days I have class at my state college and my parents won't let me drive on freeways yet. They insist that I take a driving lesson first from my old instructor. I asked my mother if she wanted to teach me (since it'll be free), but she adamantly refused. I think she made the right decision... Panic always seems to ensue whenever she's in the car with me. I wouldn't say that I'm a terrible driver to begin with, but I sure as heck don't perform my best when she's yelling, pointing, and waving in my face every passing second. I will say that my initial fears about driving have since worn off. I think I overreacted just a bit too much when I first stepped into the car. I recall nearly colliding into several vehicles... and also just barely avoiding hitting some pedestrians... and... uh... I don't remember much else. It's really all a blur.
But now that I can finally drive, all this freedom isn't as exhilarating as I thought it would be. Maybe I just find the aspect of acquiring something that I don't already have to be 'exciting'. Once I finally achieve that something, it doesn't hold up to my expectations. Or perhaps my expectations are just too high to begin with? That sounds like a more plausible answer. I always tell myself to have low expectations, so if something turns out for the worse, I'll be expecting it. If it turns out for the better, then great. I'll feel like I'm at the top of the world. But, unfortunately, it never plays out like it's supposed to... I end up having high expectations anyway.
I'll admit, my community college has an extraordinarily nice campus compared to others. They have a bunch of weird, but interesting sculptures lying around campus and a state-of-the-art library that looks like it was taken out of some high class architectural magazine. I'll even go as far as say that it looks completely out of place; the other buildings on campus look like pieces of turd in comparison.
It's nice that they spent money on the aesthetics and all, but I'd rather have them spend it on the essentials... like the restrooms for example. Some buildings only have one dinky bathroom that clearly cannot support the number of students in need of emptying their bowels. And every time I enter one, there always seems to be something broken--sinks, a urinal or two, clogged up toilets, etc. The maintenance isn't so great either. A restroom in the Physics building regularly has feces sprayed on the floor. Said restroom is also lacking a door on one of their stalls. Apparently some dude stole it. In its place, they have a green (a very old and bland looking green) shower curtain. Anyone can barge in whenever they feel like it because there is no way that they can see you. Is that unnerving or what? Especially, say, when you're constipated and require some backbreaking labor in gettin' it out. Now don't tell me that none of you have ever had the displeasure of experiencing this. You'd be lyin'.
I know the college isn't getting much money nowadays with the budget cuts and all, but public facilities should definitely be somewhere at the top of their spending list. I mean, honestly, it'd all give us some much needed relief (no pun intended).
These just never get old no matter how many times I read them.
1.) And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.
2.) My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus in it.
3.) Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.
4.) The man next door has a large erection in the garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
5.) I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
6.) Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.
7.) I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night.
8.) The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.
9.) Will you please send someone to mend the garden path, my wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant?
10.) I want to complain about the farmer across the road, every morning at 6:00am his vienerschnitzle (synonym for rooster) wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.
11.) I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
12.) I wish to report that the tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was that bad wind the other night that blew them off.
13.) I have had the clerk of the works down on the floor six times but I still have had no satisfaction.
14.) I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and the rest are plain filthy.
15.) He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it any more.
16.) Will you please send a man to look at my water? It is a funny colour and not fit to drink.
17.) I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
18.) Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two small children and would like a third so please send someone round to do something about it.
Classes have been lax so far, but that's only because less than half of them have started. The other college I'm attending doesn't start until next week. I'm dreading having to waking up at 7 A.M. again. It's such a pain. *sigh* It turns out that I won't be dorming this semester either. I canceled last minute in order to save up money for future semesters. It just can't be helped. I suppose the " full college experience" will have to wait until later on.
I was also hoping that I'd have an easier class schedule this semester, but no such luck. I'll be shouldering five classes instead of four like last semester. I did, however, drop a junior college because I luckily managed to acquire all the necessary classes. So I'm only going to two colleges this time! Hurray! I signed up for Precalculus Algebra (pretty much just college algebra), Critical Thinking/Writing, General Physics II, and some art class and history class. The latter three I'm taking at a junior college because of convenience. Oh, and they won't let me take Physics at the primary college I go to because I don't meet prereqs or something, so I figured I might as well just bypass it and get it over with ASAP.
Other than that, my life has been pretty damn boring. Well, I did get my license, but I still can't drive yet so that's a bit of a letdown. :| I've been trying to finish the video games that I purchased a while ago, but I keep losing interest. I don't remember the last time I actually finished one. I'm all worn out over anime as well. Been marathoning it lately and it's catching up to me. Blah. Maybe I should just play RS again.
On second thought, maybe not.
So... in the middle of finals, I decided to take a trip to the mall against my good judgment. I was interested in picking up some solid RPGs that I've been wanting for a while, but unfortunately they were either too pricy or too hard to find. The object of my desire was basically any Shin Megami Tensei game. Due to the limited amount of copies printed, they disappear off shelves too quickly for my tastes. And the ones that remain tend to have sky high prices ($80 for a used copy of Nocturne...). Luckily, they reprinted some of their earlier games and I managed to pick up one of them (the mentioned Nocturne) today brand spankin' new at only $40. I found it at an obscure store somewhere at the far end of the mall where no one ever visits. So hah, screw you Gamespot who has the same exact game (and in used condition) at inflated prices. I also found a couple of other SMT games at some very nice prices, though I didn't feel like splurging much. Yeah, I'll end up regretting it later.
In other news... Oh, right. I'm not done with finals yet. In the midst of all these exams, I decided to make a profile on Anime-Planet and ended up spending more hours than I can count inputting in every anime that I've ever watched when I should have been using that time to study for Physics... :P But that's over now. I took it today and I'm confident that I did well on it, which is a very rare occurrence for practically anything math-related. Then again, I've never studied this much in my entire life. Huh... So there are benefits to studying!!! Why didn't anyone tell me sooner?
OK, I think I am going study for my English final now, which roughly translates to "I am going to procrastinate until 2 A.M. and then finally start reading the incredibly, incredibly long and boring stories that I should have read months ago ". Go me.
So... I find myself stuffing food in my mouth progressively more often on a daily basis. I have no qualms about it affecting me physically because I have an extraordinarily high metabolism. It's actually kind of depressing sometimes because that makes it pretty much impossible to gain any weight. A double-edged sword of sorts, I suppose.
Right now, I'm gorging down an entire container of chocolate chip mini-muffins. Two hours ago, I was drinking a bowl of soup left over from dinner. Two hours before that, I finished a plate of dumplings from lunch. And two hours before that... I had dinner (rice, eggs, salmon, green peppers w/ meat, etc.). And that was a full meal.
I should probably start weaning myself off this habit or else I'll be taking a hell of a lot of late-night excursions when I'm dorming next semester. Well... Maybe I'll start another day. Or maybe never. I really have no self control. :D
Oh, crap. My muffins are gone. Please excuse me while I go microwave some chicken pot pie.
Of the 50 people enrolled in my Anthropology class, roughly 20 of them actually show up to class on a weekly basis. Of those 20, normally only 3 others stay until the end of the session.
Person #1 = Texter extraordinaire. That's all she does the entire class time.
Person #2 = Online gambler. Usually completely absorbed in his poker games. Likes to mutter to himself periodically.
Person #3 = Music junkie. Enjoys listening to his Ipod at the back of the class. When he's not listening to music, he's dead asleep (I wake him up at the end of class sometimes...).
Yeah, I dunno why they go to class either... I've honestly never been in a class as empty as this one.
I recently learned that the girl who sits next to me in my anatomy class lives only about 5 minutes away from my house. Turns out she went to the same high school and graduated two years before I did. We talked a lot throughout the semester, but that subject never came up. I just assumed that she just lived near the college. But hey, I was pleasantly surprised. I found out as we were signing a petition during lecture. I wrote down my zip code and she noticed that it was exactly the same as hers. I mean, what are the chances? :glasses: Anyway, she offered me a ride home 'cause I needed one that day and the timing couldn't have been better. I probably would've ended up lost in the middle of nowhere if I took the bus home.
About the petition... it's to stop the budget cuts enacted on CA colleges everywhere. I know petitions are more or less useless, but hey, at least I'm doing something. I'm already having a hard enough time getting classes and this budget cut would pretty much annihilate all hope of getting the ones I need. I was hoping to finish my General Education classes within two years and then apply for my program, but it'd be incredibly hard to do now. I was already going to have classes every winter session and summer session in addition to both fall and spring, which effectively meant no break for me... But now, yeah, I dunno what I'm going to do. Maybe I'll just hope that I'll somehow get those essential winter/summer classes, or else I'll have to pay for another year of school. :s
Yeah, and here I am. Figured it was about time I uploaded a picture.
Edit: LOL, er, yeah so I uploaded the original as well considering some of you were confused. Unfortunately, no, I don't have those extremely fashionable sideburns nor do I have that beautiful chin hair. :P
A friend of mine photoshopped it for me. :P And for the record, no, I'm not on anything. My eyes tend to look like that in a photo which can be problematic at times. :glasses:
...for someone at the beginning of the semester in my Anatomy class. At first it was just a slight infatuation, and then it grew into this problematic crush because I couldn't stop glancing at him during lecture. :P Yeah, I know, my fault entirely. I'd be distracted in class and miss a bunch of essential notes for the upcoming midterms (which I managed to pass with some luck). At that point, I just wanted to talk to him about... anything really, and fortune smiled upon me and he ended up being enrolled in my anatomy lab. He sat two seats down to the right of me and we were effectively lab partners during many of the experiments. I was at a really low point in my life then, but whenever we talked a bit, even if it was just a short "hello", it made me a lot happier. I used to think about him many times when I hit rock bottom, and it eased the pain, if only just a bit. Of course, he didn't know that I had a crush on him then; I wouldn't dream of telling him something like that. I remember him talking about his previous girlfriends at one point in his life, so he's probably straight. He could be bisexual; I'm not ruling that out, but it's not like I'm going to ask him about it... Since then, my feelings for him have pretty much waned. The attraction is still there, of course, but for the most part the crush is gone. I know it seems stupid, but I'd like to thank him for helping me through those hard times. That, however, would most likely end up being incredibly awkward (and possibly destructive), so... I'll probably end up doing nothing. Chances are that I won't ever see him again... But I know that he'll remain a warm memory in my heart.
/end cheesy introspection
*Sigh* I seriously need to stop writing at 3 A.M.
I recently finished Kino's Journey, and all I can say is that it is an absolute masterpiece. It's a simple, yet poignant anime about a traveler named Kino who goes on a journey with her talking motorcycle. She visits countries and learns about their people, customs, and way of life. As Kino travels, she experiences the darkness and the joy that is evident in each and every human being. I must admit, when I first read about it, I was turned off by it. It sounded boring; it really did. But after watching a couple episodes, it sucked me in and I couldn't get enough of it. What I especially loved about it was the characterization of Kino. She is more of an observer rather than a participator, never really embroiling herself in a situation unless the need arises. I also liked the fact that she sees the world from an objective standpoint rather than from a moral high ground like most generic protagonists.
I found it to be very introspective. Definitely made me think about human nature and the circumstances that influence it. It's a real shame that the anime fell under the radar when it came out so many years ago...
Oh, and I managed to finish Natsume Yujin Cho as well as Shigofumi: Letters from the Departed. They were very solid, especially the former. That one holds a special place in my heart (alongside Kino's Journey of course). :)
I came home the other day after exams, relieved and content, just to find out that my laptop suddenly developed an annoying whirring sound at start-up. Now, being one to jump to conclusions, I feared the worst and thought it was my hard drive wheezing its last breath. After further investigations, it turned out that my laptop fan was the cause of all of this (hopefully). So I spent about an hour taking my laptop apart just to get to the fan area so that I could clean it... but to no avail. Apparently there are invisible screws somewhere because no matter how hard I attempted to take off the casing, it wouldn't budge. Pretty much gave up on trying and instead dusted some of the other parts. After turning my laptop on again, the whirring sounds disappeared... For now, I can breathe a sigh of relief, but I'm still going to pick up a can of compressed air soon. It would be unfortunate, to say the least, if my laptop starts to die within the next couple of days. I mean, these two term papers won't write themselves. But hey, I'm an optimistic person, right?! Something like that would never happen!
In other news... I did well on my Physics exam. And by well, I mean that I am very relieved that I managed to pull at least a B on it. I haven't received my grade, but from the test problems he did after the test, I'd say that all of that studying payed off. I don't know about my Anatomy midterm, though. Hopefully I managed to get by with a low A 'cause this is one of the those incredibly important classes that I absolutely need an A in. Following the midterm (roughly about two hours later), I took the Anatomy practical. Let's just say that I've never despised the male reproductive system (as well as the female's--you ladies aren't getting off so easily either!) so vehemently in my entire life. But despite all the hate, I pulled a 90, so I'm satisfied. Composition yesterday was a bearer of great news as well; I learned I managed to somehow get an A- on my in-class essay/midterm. I bs'ed about half of it because I drew a blank, but oh well!
For once this entire semester I don't have anything to study for. Time to make the best of this weekend.
The college experience has mellowed out quite a bit since the first week. My depression, as predicted, waned over the past three months. No doubt it had something to do with the immense amount of papers that I had to do. There are still periods, mainly late at night, that depression hits me. And when it hits, it hits hard. I've been handling it, I'd say, quite well seeing as I'm still managing to complete all of my work.
Contrary to what my mother said over summer, she's now forcing me to dorm at my college over the spring semester. Apparently she couldn't stand driving me to three colleges over the past three months... I'll expound on the reason another day. It's a long story. Anyway, she gave in the other day and finally decided that I could get my driver's license. Didn't study much and managed to fail my permit test (:D). My fault for not actually doing the online practice tests. I have two more tries, but I'm not attempting it anytime soon. 2 midterms, a practical, a lab report, and a 9 page research paper on Fitzgerald's Winter Dreams (which is incredibly boring I might add) due next week = :D. And that's exactly what I should be studying/doing right now, but I'm feeling particularly chatty today. The other day I filled out my dorm application and mailed it in. I doubt they actually read it anyway... but hopefully I'll get a roommate with at least one similar interest...? It'd be pretty awkward if we never have anything to talk about. And you know what else I learned? The dorm rooms don't have internet access, which is a travesty. There's wifi on every part of the campus except that one. I mean, how else will I relieve myself during those boring late nights?
Oh, and I finally told my mother about my sexual orientation, mainly to get her to vote No on Prop 8. We were in the car one day and the topic came up. Her first response was: so would you be the man or the woman in a relationship? *facepalm* And then she went into a state of denial and insisted that I wasn't attracted to the same sex, citing the reason that I wasn't "effeminate" enough. *double facepalm* She really needs to stop watching so much TV. I'm sad to say that my efforts to change her views were fruitless as she ended up voting Yes on 8 anyway. She later told me that she voted for McCain as well, and not because she liked his stances, but because of the fact that Obama was black. *sigh* I was deeply disappointed in her, but I guess you really can't teach an old dog new tricks... Can't say I was hurt, though. I effectively severed emotional ties with her long ago, and perhaps I was right in doing so. To give her some credit, her response to my coming out wasn't that bad compared to what others have experienced. I mean, she hasn't kicked me out of the house or attempted to stab with a knife. Yet.
Great... So I was taking pictures of random crap in my room tonight and having the time of my life when lo and behold, the camera slips from my fingers and drops literally four inches and hits the desk. And now it's dead. I've tried gently smacking it, pulling out the lenses when opening it, pulling out the lenses when closing it, screaming obscenities at it (followed by lots of crooning), but nothing worked. If anything, I think I made it worse. Now the error message is accompanied by a long foreboding drone coming from somewhere inside my lens. This makes me wish I had warranty. >.<
Summer's been pretty uneventful. Haven't really done much except go to a few parties here and there, but mainly concentrated on attending my classes. Signed up for General Biology and an online Intro to Microsoft Word/Excel/Access/etc. at a local community college. Additionally, I also took a pre-semester prep class for college (mandatory), but that isn't worth mentioning as it was only four days long. You know, I thought online courses would be much easier because I could do it in the convenience of my own home. But after even taking an easy class like that, I never want to sign up for one again. It's hard for me to discipline myself to watch the video lectures and do the online quizzes when I'm at home with my "relaxed" mindset. My mind wanders and I end up taking triple the amount of time just to finish something. I did, however, manage to pass with an "A", but it took a lot more effort than I imagined it would take. For the fall semester, I'm taking General Physics, Anatomy, Writing/Critical Thinking, and Intro to Anthropology. Being the first week and all, things are going somewhat smoothly. Only class I'm really concerned about is Physics because I struggled with it in high school, and my professor lecturing at the speed of light doesn't help either. Luckily, I still manage to remember bits and pieces from the past, so it has made putting everything together somewhat easier.
For this semester, instead of solely going to one community college, I'm balancing two of them and a state college. I don't know how I got dragged into this, but it's not something that I really want. I know I just have to deal with it, but it's just so very very tiring. Because of this and a bunch of other deeply-rooted issues, my relationship with my family has been deteriorating even further. Arguments fly left and right and I don't know what to do anymore. My mental health hasn't gotten any better either. Normally my depression flares up during the summertime and dies down during the school year when I keep myself busy. But now that school has become a part of my depression, I honestly find it quite hard to concentrate... on anything really. I recently just came out to my close friends about my sexuality, something that I've been struggling with for years. I just changed my Facebook orientation status yesterday so I don't know what to expect now. With that said, the slight positivity that I've garnered from resolving that issue (or partially anyway) is being trampled on by my other ones. I'm considering therapy right now, but I feel awkward talking to a complete stranger, even if he is a professional. I've mainly just stuck with my support network of friends and it's kept me from sinking further, but I feel guilty for burdening them with my issues as I'm sure that they have problems of their own as well.
Hmm, kind of lost right now...
It does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it? That was my class's mantra for the past four years of high school, and now I've finally graduated. Can't say I'm excited or anything, but that's just me. As usual, I rushed and got everything ready last minute. That was when I realized that there was this huge fruit punch stain on my tie (thanks to my brother). And then I got to school and I remembered that I forgot to bring my ID card which was needed to acquire my diploma after the ceremony... Yeah, the day didn't start out too well.
Graduation itself was a bit too long for my tastes. I was thoroughly bored just sitting in my seat waiting for my classmates to finish their speeches. Only part I slightly remember is an odd reference to green eggs & ham, something about life being comprised of both good cholesterol and bad cholesterol... and something about eating said eggs and ham. I don't know, I was hungry and thirsty so anything food-related completely caught my attention. It also didn't help that it was over a 100 degrees and we were sitting out in the sun in caps and gowns with formal wear underneath. I wasn't surprised when I saw a few ambulances after graduation. Some old folks probably got heat stroke from sitting through the ceremony. On a good note, My stepsisters brought me my ID card so I did actually get my diploma afterward, which was a relief.
Grad Nite started a couple hours after the ceremony. I regret not buying a ticket at the beginning of the school year. They jacked up the prices from $75 to $125 so I didn't know if I wanted to buy one. I actually had plans of sneaking in with a friend, but that fell short after scoping out the area. The security was tight and our only opening was pretty much out of the question. So we just ended up giving them our hard-earned money. The theme was "Hollyweird" and they definitely pulled it off aesthetically, but the attractions were dull. After you've been on them once you never want to go on them again. There was a rock climbing thing, a "visual" roller coaster, carnival games, arcades, an axis rotation, free make overs, laser tag (which was partially defective...), casino (with fake money, of course), and some other things but that's all I really remember. Oh, there were also caricature artists and hand molders so that was pretty cool, but the lines were so immensely long that it made you think twice about getting one. Highlight of the night was a show by a hypnotist called " The Entertainer". The things he made our classmates do were hilarious. You could tell that some of the volunteers were faking it, but most of them were really into it. He ended up twisting one of the volunteer's hands 540 degrees... It was just amazing. That show alone made the $125 worth it. Grad Nite ended with that performance and we got home at around 6 A.M. I was tired, but didn't get much sleep as usual. I'm just happy that my night ended with a bang. :glasses:
The difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know, and I couldn't care less.
We have more to fear from the bungling of the incompetent than from the machinations of the wicked.
I've given up the search for reality; now I'm just looking for a good fantasy.
Credit, is the only enduring testimonial to man's confidence in man.
The difference between a lawyer and a rooster is that the rooster gets up in the morning and clucks defiance.
Just Friends phrase - I don't just want you to mourn the loss; I want to remind you of it every day. I want you to suffer. I want you to envy. I want you to die slowly, a bit at a time. And I want you to smile and thank me for it.
Carpin Denium - There's a fish in my pants.
Mundus vult decipi decipiatur ergo. (Screw the customer)
Sic transit gloria mundi. (So passes away the glory of this world.) -Thomas a Kempis
Leave a message, and I'll IM you back later. Leave a SEXY message and I'll IM you back sooner.
36 years old is significant, because at 36 you can sleep with someone half your age and not go to jail.
Hello. Here are my answers to yesterday's messages, in order of their arrival. Yes. Tomorrow at 5pm. Duct tape and piano wire. Tonight's safety word will be banana. No. Thank you.
Friends will keep you sane, Love could fill your heart, A lover can warm your bed, But lonely is the soul without a mate. - David Pratt
Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up these defenses, you build this whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life. You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They do something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own any more. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. not just in the mind. It's a soul hurt, a body hurt, a real gets inside you and rips you apart pain. I hate love. - Neil Gaiman
When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". fudge off. What good is a goddamn cake you can't eat? What should I eat, someone else's cake instead? - George Carlin
I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse. - Woody Allen
Life... is like a box of chocolates. A cheap, thoughtless, perfunctoral gift that no one ever asks for. Unreturnable because all you get back is another box of chocolates. So, you're stuck with mostly undefinable whipped mint crap, mindlessly wolfed down when there's nothing else to eat while you're watching the game. Sure, once is a while you get a peanut butter cup or an English toffee but it's gone too fast and the taste is fleeting. In the end, you are left with nothing but broken bits filled with hardened jelly and teeth-shattering nuts, which, if you are desperate enough to eat, leaves nothing but an empty box of useless brown paper. - Smoking Man
We the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much for so long that we are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
Hi, I'm probably here, I'm just avoiding someone I don't want to talk to. Leave a message and if I don't IM you back, well, what can I say?
"God is as real as I am." he assured me, and my faith was restored, for I knew Santa would never lie.
Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it is time to get up.
Evolution -- life's a niche, and then you die.
The election season is officially underway, along with the traditional political food chain of information. The candidates say something, their staff explains what they meant, media pundits explain what they really meant, and the public bases its decision on the ensuing late-night talk show opening monologues.
People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.
Never judge a man till you have walked a mile in his shoes, 'cause by then, he's a mile away, you've got his shoes, and you can say whatever the hell you want to.
Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy ANYTHING.
If you are the credit card company, I already sent the money. If you are one of my friends, you owe me money. If you are female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
My philosophy is a mixture of the three famous schools -- the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans - and all three can be summed up in my famous phrase, "You can't trust any bugger further than you can throw him, and there's nothing you can do about it, so let's have a drink."
It's is not, it isn't ain't, and it's it's, not its, if you mean it is. If you don't, it's its. Then too, it's hers. It isn't her's. It isn't our's either. It's ours, and likewise yours and theirs.
More can be found here.
Decided to try out World 16 Airs for once and it greatly sped things up. Not sure what to do now... Guess I'll just resume fishing and the occasional Rune mining (need funds for 99 Crafting). I've been getting bored of this game lately, so I probably won't be as active as I used to be. Maybe it's time for another break. :D
I have two tests tomorrow and I spent all of my study time looking at these pictures. I'm screwed, but it was well worth it.
Some are old and some I've never seen before. They all made my day, though.
(56k Warning - Large Pics)
...was fun to say the least. :D
We rented a hummer limo for 20 people to get us to our destination. It really didn't seat that many, though; some of us had to sit on half a seat or sit on the floor. We were the last couple to get on the limo because we ended up arriving 30 minutes late. I thought they were going to leave us behind. :P The limo was supposed to leave promptly at 7, but we were delayed because of the hold up at the bridal shop. We would've made it on time if it weren't for all those people who got their pictures taken before we did... and we signed up prior to them arriving, too. :P I thought everyone would be angry that we got there so late, but they surprisingly weren't. I'm glad it turned out okay or else it would've made for a long and awkward ride.
Our prom was held at an aquarium, and I heard from many people in the past that the last prom held there was amazing. We had to wait another 30 minutes to get in after arriving there, so we just walked around and took pictures. By the time we entered, we were starving, so we all ran to the food stations (which really was just one station...). The food was disappointing, and it all disappeared within 20 minutes, too. So much for the "unlimited food". My goal of eating back my money was destroyed right then and there. :D There was supposedly going to be Starbucks coffee there as well, but I didn't see any Starbucks, just some cheap knock-off. After dinner, we explored the aquarium. They let us go through two of their exhibits, but we couldn't see anything half the time because they turned off the lights. But it was still a really great experience. Afterwards, we let loose on the dance floor. It was a bit awkward because I'm not much of a dancer, but it got a lot better once a few slow songs got on. We couldn't keep serious expressions on our faces 'cause so many people ended up bumping into us. We couldn't stop laughing. On top of that, one guy took a chair from the side and dragged it onto the dance floor. He started straddling it and "singing" off-key to the music. Was a shame that he only lasted about two minutes before the chaperones chastised him.
Prom ended at midnight and our group disbanded. Some went home while others went to after parties. I just chilled with my friends. We ordered pizza, ate chips, and played games all night long. Ended up coming home at around 7 A.M. today. I slept for about four hours and then I woke up because I needed to return my tux. I'm still tired, but now I can't go back to sleep. I'll just make up my hours tomorrow in class.
Tbh, I didn't expect much from prom. I thought I'd be bored out of my mind, but that wasn't the case. I definitely have no regrets. :)