Recipe For Disaster: Dessourt, Gelatinnoth Mother And The Culinomancer
Entry posted by Merch Gwyar
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To recap: I attempted Dessourt before, from home, and my computer lagged, then froze. Only the Ring of Life kept me from losing a lot of valuable stuff. As I walked away from Falador Castle, blinking in the bright sunshine of utter relief, I vowed to return to the fight on a faster computer.
So it happened, this dinnertime, on the work's computer, I logged on and home ported myself to Lumbridge. I was immediately side-tracked by two different lower levelled players wanting to plunder my own skills. This was the new 'assist' update, which came out today. It's quite an interesting concept and one which I had great plans for, though, under closer examination, there are several flaws in the system. (Not all skills are listed; the player assisting has to be standing right next to you and cannot do anything else whilst assisting you etc.) Nonetheless, it does seem like it might still come in useful.
I eventually pressed through the clambering crowds to the chest in Lumbridge Castle basement and packed a super-set, an ectophial and several monkfish. I wore my black dragonhide trousers and gloves, rune boots, a rune platebody, my purple elemental helm, glory, ring of life and I carried my rune kiteshield with a dragon skimmy. Entering the chamber, Dessourt didn't freeze my screen. He hit high and frequently, so I seemed to be eating fish more than actually hitting him. (This situation was only made slightly better once I realized that my auto retaliate was off and switched it back on again. LOL) Eventually though, Dessourt was pwned and I was running as fast as my little feet could carry me to the portal.
The most cursory peruse of my bank account told me that I didn't have enough (or, in some cases, any) of the 'carrier' runes to take on the Gelatinnoth Mother. I also didn't have any pressed essense nor much money. I did, however, have a cat. I popped myself over to Ardoughe, pausing to check the health of my jade vine, then crept into the plagued streets of the Western part of the city. I emerged shortly afterwards with a guilty conscience and 100 death runes. I have been assured that Loki will be well looked after and will be in his hellish element chasing rats, with a nice fire to curl up beside later.
I packed the super-set, an ectophial, 100 death runes, 500 water, fire and earth runes, 250 air runes and a staff (all I had), a magic shortbow and 100 of my precious rune arrows, a poisoned dragon dagger, rune kiteshield and the rest were fish. This seemed like the hardest fight of all, so I included 5 of my cooked sharks. (I can't cook, or indeed catch, sharks, so my small stock of them is fiercely rationed.) The rest of my bag was filled with monkfish. I did consider getting changed, but the mixture of melee and magic attacks upon me seemed to equally fit what I already had on. I walked off to the portal.
The Gelatinnoth Mother and I had a fairly leisurely fight. Unlike her predecessor in the 'Horror of the Deep', I could actually see her as we fought. The screen had been at a weird angle last time. I noticed that I barely took any damage if I was fighting with the right thing, but took a great deal as I swopped between them. For example, if she swopped from orange to green, I was fine whilst meleeing and then ranging thereon, but as I swopped between dragon dagger and mage shortbow, I was hammered. Though the fight went on for a while, I quite enjoyed it. I was gratified to see that my ranging actually seemed to do the most damage of all my attacks.
Then she was dead. I raced forward to pick up my arrows (having forgotten to wear Ava's Accumulator), as the Culinomancer finished waffling and starting attacking me. I initially ranged him, as that was the last thing I'd been doing as the Gelatinnoth Mother died, but that didn't seem to be making much headway. I swopped to dragon dagger and shield, but in the meantime, the Culinomancer got some really big hits on me. I came closer to death than I had with either of the previous two fights! This was when the sharks came into play. I'd been guarding them like an old Scrouge, during the harder fights, but I needed them just to survive now. Wiser people would have probably healed and restocked between the two fights, but I thought I could handle it.
I did, but only by the skin of my teeth. Yay! The longest quest in Runescape was finally over! 
After an agony of choice, I eventually used the 20k xp on runecrafting, thus awarding myself level 55 in that, with only 3k to go until 56. :s
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