Jump to content
Sal's RuneScape Forum
  • entries
  • comments
  • views

This Is A Very Ominous Assignment, With Overtones Of Extreme Personal Danger.

Sign in to follow this  


There was once a wise old spider and all the confused young gharials would come to him and ask "Oh wise old spidery spider, I ever so confused, I have so many problems, please help me and give me some of your wisdom, you decrepit little turd."

The spider would briefly ponder in his tiny wheelchair before professing "You need not worry! Just be yourself and do not worry what other people think of you! Live today as if it were your last!" to which the gharial would reply "THANK YOU!" and swim off to make a sandwich or whatever they do these days.

Anyway, the moral of the story is that the spider is a complete moron who gives lame advice.


Firstly, there is no way you can't be yourself. In fact, it's the only thing you can't not do. If there's anything intrinsic to your being then it's that you are yourself (actually, I think the cogito is bogus but I'm ranting here so shut up). You can't be anyone else. Sure, you can pretend to like things you don't actually like but that doesn't mean you're now Edward P. Kasawari and you're no longer Hilary St. Motorvehicleexplosion.

Secondly, if you don't consider what other people will think of you then you won't get anywhere in this world because humans are evidenly social beings. There are many of us and we are in constant contact. Thinking about what other people will think of you isn't just acceptable, it's functional, baby. Fucntional like a vacuum cleaner.

Finally, if you live every day like it's your last then you'll never get anything done, you won't be able to save any money, you can't do anything that involves more than 23 hours and 59 minutes of planning, preparation or forethought and you'll probably end up in some kind of prison. I don't know anyone who genuinely lives every day as if it were their last and if I ever do meet someone who does, I'll dropkick them into a swimming pool full of dropkicks.


Eat 5 steaks a day, treat your wife as an object and always treat old ladies as bomb threats.

These words are more appropriate for anyone finding their way in life.

Thank me with money.

Sign in to follow this  

1 Comment

Recommended Comments

I would but I spent it all on my Radiohead tickets :rolleyes:I've been dormant in Sal's for about a year and a half now, but with my parents downloading Google Chrome and my internet blocks being lifted, I'm now free to explore. The put blocks up, oddly enough, because of my conversion to Atheism. They're ultra-Christians, like half the population around here. Hell, I didn't know how I convinced them to buy me RH tickets.Anyways, I'll be reading and commenting on your blog. I might make my own, but I'm too lazy at the moment.

Share this comment

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines and Privacy Policy.