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How Strange...?


Merch Gwyar

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This morning I nipped into the cooking guild for my breakfast. As I busied myself moving between bank and range, another player kept getting under my feet. Odeon was dressed almost identically. Both of us were clad in our Varrock 3 armour (ideal for getting through the door) and our quest capes, but we didn't initially speak. It was that awkward shuffling of strangers, both intent on sizzling fish without burning them, and anyway, I was chatting in Canting.

 

Then Odeon went, :wub:. I glanced at him, then around the room; I had a quick reccy over the wall at the wider cooking guild, but nothing untoward appeared to be happening. I responded with a >.>. Odeon replied with >>? To which I ran out of emoticons and resorted to speaking. 'You said :D, so I was looking to ensure that we weren't being invaded by orks or something.' Odeon assured me that there were no orks in the vicinity. In fact, it was highly unlikely that there would be so far south. After a moment, he added an afterthought, 'except maybe in Zanaris.' To this, I had to smile, as I've only recently dealt with that particular infestation. In fact, Zanaris is now completely ork-free, because I went on a bit of a mission there to help out the Fairy Queen. I couldn't resist smugly telling Odeon that it's ok, I've dealt with the orks in Zanaris.

 

This caused a bit of consternation, as he paused in his fish cooking to look at me with a puzzled frown. The weird thing was that he too had done just that. In roughly the same time frame too. In fact, as we compared experiences, it transpired that the Fairy Queen and her general, the Tooth Fairy, had set us both the same task! We had each, individually, taken out the Fairy Godfather. Even more bizarre, when I mentioned that I'd been given a self-filling watering can as a reward, he gasped and said he'd received the same!

 

We both cooked in silence for a few seconds, taking this in. I resolved to see the Fairy Queen ASAP and have this out with her. Why on Earth is she making both Odeon and I save Zanaris? In fact, that's got terrible implications insofar as she must have reinstated the Fairy Godfather, opened the rift and let the orks back in, in order for both of us to do that. Odeon was thinking along the same lines. "Perhaps it's some kind of tourist trap," he mused.

 

And that's when things really got weird. It's best if you just read the conversation of us comparing notes here:

odeon.png

 

Before we could get to the bottom of it, a black cat appeared. In an obvious pointer towards some kind of Gielinor wide conspiracy theory, Odeon was abducted right in front of my face! In utter shock, I just mindlessly finished cooking my fish. I was considering marching over to Draynor right then and there to confront the Wise, Old Man. After all, something is happening with all of these quests if both Odeon and I are having to separately rescue the same people and relieve the same places. And now for him to just be taken like that!

 

I was about to rush out and kick bottom, when Odeon was suddenly returned. He stared at me wild-eyed and informed me that he'd just been taken to a parallel dimension. His eyes narrowed in suspicion, as he accused, "Perhaps YOU are from a parallel dimension!"

 

This did seem a likely explanation, especially since my next quest was already lined up. I told him about it, "I'm having to go to a parallel dimension now. I've got to find a place called Real Life."

 

Odeon nodded, sagely, "I've heard of this place."

 

"Then find a place called Work."

 

"Good luck." He said. I thanked him and we said our goodbyes. Bit shocking for first thing in a morning though, wouldn't you agree?

 

odeon2.png

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:o This is just ridiculous, those experiences you speak of, they sound familiar to me too. How much parallel dimensions are there?

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Elvarg is still alive! This must be stopped!

I've started trying to help someone in the desert, slaves and such...what the Guthix is going on?

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:confused: It seems I have the same problem....I remember the desert slaves some years ago...how strange, I was sure I freed some all...I just *hope* Nomad is still alive so I can get a shoot at a quest cape...;)
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OMG Helm, you're right!!! And I thought I did everyone a huge favour by chopping off Elvarg's head which by now, I believe, is hanging in Oziach's house... Some crazy necromancer must be at work here...

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Damnit professor, keep an eye on the rifts, looks like Quin had been letting sliders through to other dimensions again :facepalm:

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Merch, I must admit. I killed the godfather too.

 

Does this mean that there is a godfather still roaming around somewhere??/

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You do realise all the monsters you kill, all the bosses you vanquish on your quests, are lookalikes, used to protect the original monster? The Godfather is still out there, plotting. Elvarg is still there, protected from the lava from her thick dragonhide, under the volcano?

___The head Oziach apparently hangs up (In my day we just got teleported out and felt stronger inside) is a fake, carefully checked over by Elvarg herself to make sure nobody finds out.

_____The slaves you helped, they are really working for the RSATL, the RuneScape Adventurer Testing Lab. The RSATL creates fake quests to test adventurers, so they know who to rely on for the Battle for RuneScape war. They keep your progress tracked with points, and it is they that deliver the scroll to you. You don't know it, but I do.

___Nomad, he was created from the RuneScape Bank, to bankrupt players, so they can withdraw loans. He only got so powerful through a series of expensive training methods, which the Bank used your money for!

___The Corporeal beast? He's real. The Kalphite Queen, too. The King Black Dragon is real.

_____The Corporeal beast does not die, he simply melts away into a powder too thin for the human eye to see, dropping any item he had absorbed, until he (or it) can repair itself.

___The Kalphite Queen used her own spawn to take over. She injects them with a special resin, made from crushed dragon armour (usually the chain) to make them grow. Sometimes the Queen can't crush the chain before an adventurer fights her. Now you know why the dragon chainbody is dropped when you viciously murder a hatchling barely an hour old.

___The King Black dragon's lair is above the Dragon Houses. When the current king is killed, the houses quickly elect a new dragon, and inject a resin made of the horn on a dragon medium helmet to grow another head, and give them their respective special breath. This solves the mystery of the dragon medium helm. Now, would you believe you are killing a politician every time you decimate a king black dragon?

 

Well me and my associate have no more to say. Larry! Stop glaring at penguins and polar bears! We have more research to do!

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My theory: There are 67 alternate planes between which all Runescape players are. So Player A is in plane #7 and kills a cow. The cow is sent to another plane to be healed by one of his living counterparts on another plane so the only real way to kill say... Nomad is to kill him simultaneously across all 67 planes.

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