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Why You Should Never Go On A Chinese Tour

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So far China has been really beautiful and kinda strange. Beijing's been industrialized to the point where I wanted to, I could sorta pretend that it's Richmond, but every once in a while I'll see a billion bikes ride past or a huge flipping tour bus drive by six inches from the one I'm in Then five people will jaywalk across the street and almost get run over and then I'll be like, yeah... Not Canada.


I don't know what I expected hotel-wise, probably the room to be flooded with panda semen and the desk clerk to open his mouth and have an endless stream of bedbugs pour out or something, but it's actually a really nice hotel. There's a huge flatscreen tv and of course, there's internet otherwise I wouldn't be posting this. Then there's the swimming pool, gym and buffet every morning. Then again, I didn't really get to take advantage of most of this stuff firsthand, because...


The tours are frickin' 14 hours long nonstop and most of it is spent waiting for people who don't ever seem to stop peeing. They don't even give you 10 minutes to check out the souvenir shop or go to McDonalds to grab a drink that won't give you horrible diarrhea.


Then they take you to three different places, one of which is guaranteed to be a 1-2 hour long infomercial (aka a tea shop) and the tour guide NEVER STOPS TALKING. NEVER.


So if you want to sleep on the bus, good luck.


Personally I feel really sorry for the tour guide, who has to stand and talk for 14 hours every single day for seven days a week.

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Pretty standard for all tours (even to other countries :P ) run by Chinese tour agencies, just a heads up. Personally, for value-for-money in a small family, its worth it to pay a bit more for a small group tour by a local guide in the country you plan to visit. :)

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