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Synapsi

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     Sal's had been so intertwined with young me's development for so long it's funny to me how I'm still drawn to make this post even though it's been like three and a half years since my last one. In that time I've become a homeowner, gotten married, adopted a dog, and yet nothing drew a post out of me til now. Coming up on a year ago now the pieces slid into place for me and I saw the clearest picture of myself to date. In my first few years here as a freshly minted member I was a proud witness to more than a few forumers finding themselves and it's only taken me a decade to catch up. Sometimes I can only shake my head at young me but then again, who am I to judge? I forget how long ago it was but at one point this year I made a semi-subtle status update alluding to the subject of this post but deleted it after being surprised by a facebook chat invite to a group of slammers. Real life name meets internet folk, you know how it goes.

     So I guess this is take two? I'm split between sharing a fundamental part of myself with a scattered group I considered friends and the status quo of shutting in. But today was rough for me, all I want to do is eat again or watch more Netflix. And I'm just about out of whiskey. There’s this weird duality where it feels like I’ve had to grow up so fast while dealing with doctors and insurance for the first time, and yet I’m experiencing at the same time the rollercoaster of self-discovery and emotions I would’ve associated with middle school. Whether it's today with you or a year from now with literally everyone else, I'll have to get used to trusting in people's goodness. And so, with more time on my hands than ever, I ask this one question: do you think there's a prominent trans slammer I might have been aware of? You know, asking for a friend. 

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We're all growing up. I'm very happy to see life is treating another old member of the community so well.
We've never really talked much I believe, but I remember you and seeing you post here feels very nostalgic.
Don't feel scared of interacting with Sal's Realm members in real life. I still keep contact with plenty on Facebook. I've grew to view them as more than just old community friends, but actual real life friends too.

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I can appreciate the sentiment, I’m just in a weird flux IRL as you could imagine. I’m out to close friends and immediate family, and let’s just say my in-laws fall well to the right politically which made that conversation exceptionally hard. So yeah, it’s not that I’m scared of talking with any ol’ slammer because I wouldn’t be posting now if I were but I wasn’t ready to be putting out fires on a second (or third) front. Ya never know where word will travel is all. So Wilt (and the dozen or two assorted slammers), if you see this, now you know why I was so skittish with the FB group chat lol. It was literally less than 24 hours after I’d posted on here saying I’m lgbt. 

Edited by Synapsi

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Heya! Not trying to throw you under the bus for sure with the random chat add, just trying to make sure you're not left behind :) 

I totally understand the desire to fight one thing at a time and I'm sorry to have made you feel that way, inadvertent though it was. I hadn't seen your old post, no, just a weird coincidence of timing. I hope this new chapter of self-discovery goes well for you and that you're able to find a place among your community with this new-to-them bit of identity. Feel free to reach out if you ever need to chat - here works, or email me: (my username)@gmail.com. Miss you, old friend.

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No worries Wilt, I had quite a bit of nostalgia seeing a lot of familiar names there. Some of them seemingly living somewhat close to me too. :ph34r: It was quite the blast from the past, as short as I made it. I’m often finding myself missing the sense of community I had in sal’s back in the day, within the last year uniquely even more so. It doesn’t help that on average my coworkers are 10 years minimum older than me, and in different places in their lives than me as well. Hell, that’s probably true across the industry for all I know. And for a while now the vast majority of my friends have scattered in pursuit of their own lives. It puts me at an odd place in my life with so few connections, barring family. So yeah, the good ol’ rusty sals blog it is. 

Edited by Synapsi
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Sal's had been so intertwined with young me's development

wasnt sal's like still 10 years away from existing when u were young

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Synapsi

Posted (edited)

On 5/3/2020 at 6:04 AM, Lonelywolf said:

wasnt sal's like still 10 years away from existing when u were young

Depends on what you define as young I guess, I was including mid-teens for myself. I joined 14 years ago! And was more or less active for half of that

Edited by Synapsi

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21 hours ago, Synapsi said:

Depends on what you define as young I guess, I was including mid-teens for myself. I joined 14 years ago! And was more or less active for half of that

ye i was just making a joke that ur old teehee

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We're always gonna be young at heart, I swear people never really grow up. 

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