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I'd like you all to and tell me who is the most illumonetty company, and why is it Jagex?

Revamped with new goals! What are the goals? 115 Dungeoneering! --- 98 all! Why these numbers? 115 Dungeoneering is required to access a new resource dungeon within the elf city of Prifddinas. I wish to reach this goal either before or close to the release of Prifddinas. Level 98 in all other skills will allow me to get close to maxing without actually maxing, allowing me to take advantage of the new Prifddinas content before i max. Possibly using the city to get the last level in each of my remaining skills. ~WORK IN PROGRESS~

Hey runescape community. I am currently going for 99 firemaking. As you all know that could get expensive. I have spent all my money on maple logs and I am about to run out soon. I came here to see if there was anyone that could help me out with getting maple logs or money. I really want to keep going with firemaking without having to spend a lot of time on other things. So if there is anyone that could help me out with getting money or logs please add me on runescape. My username is (ekkelisa) Currently lvl 63 firemaking. Been doing it for 2 days. Thanks for your time.

So what skill(s) are you going to train? I think I'll likely train Magic since I'm not that far from 99, and maybe try to get at least 1 Ranged level.

This is how my hiscores stand at Imbolc 2012. I'm anticipating getting 91 Summoning later today, when I do my penguin run. I also have my Troll Invasion to do for this month, which gives me more XP to play with. I'm undecided whether I will continue ploughing all of the Distraction and Diversion XP into Summoning or shift to something else. The temptation is to get Summoning high enough to finish the task master, but that's all of the way to 95. It's also tempting to transfer these weekly things into Crafting, Smithing or Slayer instead. The next time I do Tears of Guthix, my Slayer will go higher than Attack. That feels a bit weird! It will also mess up my keeping the combat levels equal. Currently the main goal is to edge everything up to level 91+ (then 92+, and so on).

I'm back! Did anyone miss me? I've been away at a friend's house for New Year and I had a lovely time. Coming back was a little tricky. I attempted to return yesterday, but gales made that not a sensible idea. Mind you, I discovered that I'm a very good driver IRL. Onto my skills! With everything over 90, it's basically a free-for-all. I'm still shoving penguin points etc onto Summoning, as I want to raise that for the tasks. I'm willing to accept advice on what else I should be paying attention to. Is there something here that I should be prioritising for a next level? Happy New Year all!

After completing 'Ritual of the Mahjarret', I was given some xp lamps. Two of them combined to give me 91 Runecrafting. It was very sweet. <_< The first thing I did was rush over to the Nature Altar to craft double runes. This used to be the Holy Grail of Runecrafting. MFI assured me that it still was. I'd totally forgotten that it also meant that I potentially never have to Runecraft again. I could just hang around up World 117 Daemonheim each day, assisting people with effigies. Jethraw gently reminded me of the fact and off I went. Unfortunately, it seemed like every other high level Runecrafter had the same idea. I was standing there, sandwiched between two other people offering 91 Runecrafting and a third spam clicking his quick chat: My Runecrafting level is 91. There were also people with 93 Runecrafting and (my heart sank) someone with 99 in it too. None of us were getting any bites. I stood there for a good 10-15 minutes before I sensed defeat. All of this time, someone had been calling out for a 97 Construction assist. I've never been in his position, but I understand that it's not a good one. There's only about 13k people in the game who can help with a 97 Construction effigy. It can take weeks to find one of us, then longer to find one of us who isn't maxed. I was tired of getting nothing for my 91 Runecrafting offer, so decided to make this dude's day. I started walking across. I was just a few paces away from him when, presumably in his frustration, he made a homophobic comment about the world at large. I stopped. With my 'I can help with your 97 Con' message already typed but unsent, I stopped dead. As if on cue, another player arrived and started shouting out, 'Need 97 Con!' I walked straight past the first player and traded the second. I waited until he'd requested assistance and I'd accepted, before I pressed enter on my 'I can help with your 97 Con'. He gushed out his thanks, while the first player continued to call. We were right next to him. It couldn't have been planned better if it was scripted. "I don't assist homophobes." I told him, before I teled away.

I seem to go through cycles of levelling, where I get several at once, then nothing for a while. Burning so many Vyrewatch left me very close to a Firemaking level, while battling to save the Canting citadel from decay has pushed up my Woodcutting XP. I've barely stepped foot in Gielinor today (I've written 4 blogs/articles, 5 if we're including this one, instead), but it was still enough to get me two level 93s. The Citadel does desperately need some love, Canting. A couple of people have been in before me and chopped some wood. I've just added about 400 logs. I'll finish my cap tomorrow; but I'm knackered right now, so I'm abed. For those following the Excel thing, there's another one up: Part 4: Adding Activity Logs and More to your Runescape Excel Hiscores Tracker. Nos da, cariadiau. *kisses all round* Merci beaucoup, Fred, for the banner!

My Vyrewatch genocide has finally reached its conclusion. I've brutally murdered 500 of them, then cremated their remains in the Columbarium. It's made more distasteful in the fact that, as an historian, singling out a single race for slaughter, then burning their bodies in a purpose made building, has a very specific, nasty connotation. I know very well that journey back and forth from Paterdomus basement to Canifis Bank. I've done it 501 times in a row. The one being when I reached the bank, opened it up to get the next batch, then realised that I still had 14 keys in my inventory. I cursed. Keys = prizes, so I probably did make the cost of the magic pyre logs back. I didn't keep a running tally, but it felt like I did. I saw a curiosity while I was doing all of this. Is it usual for Blamish Snails to crawl into Canifis town itself? I've never seen that before. They're usually out in the swamp or Mor'ton for me. I did have a wonderful piece of luck in killing the exact amount. I'd returned to that spot in Meiyerditch, where it's much more sedate and I can watch telly at the same time. I bumped into a gentleman who was doing one of the early quests and therefore had arrived the long way. He hadn't brought a knife with him, on the basis that he had one in his toolbelt. He tried to slash the portrait and nothing happened. The invisible narrator told him that he needed a knife. I intervened when I heard him raging. Once he'd explained the situation, it was no big deal for me to teleport to Burgh de Rott, grab a knife and return with it. I just dumped the Vyrewatch corpses in my bank, while I was there. It wasn't a full inventory. He got his knife and I went on killing Vyrewatch. It occurred to me that I hadn't checked to see how many more corpses I needed. I filled my inventory and returned to the bank. Then I wooted. I had exactly the right amount. That brief interlude had placed me a single inventory away. :lol: My updated maths knowledge now leads me to believe that I've gained +10 on my minimum hit against any Vyrewatch, for every 50 Vyrewatch killed. As I've burnt 500, that's a +100 bonus that I can use against Vanstrom Klause. I can't get any more bonuses, as the update to the blisterwood weapons and Ivanis Flail end at 500. I've given myself the best chances I can. It just remains to kill the man. In other news, the money pouch is now working for me. I can buy in the GE and at shops, without extracting coins from the pouch. I don't know if there's been some kind of update fixing it, because it was working all along for Chaosor. Now that it's doing the same for me, I'm upgrading my opinion of it from 'annoying' to 'great'! Merci beaucoup, Fred, for the banner!

In my bid to actually kill Vanstrom Klause, I'm trying to tip the odds of the fight into my favour. On Msclick's advice, I've cut and fletched 500 blisterwood stakes. Though melee does hit higher, the range option allows you to hit him across the room. Msclick and I have similar combat skills (which has nothing to do with the actual levels we've attained), so I listen to her over the likes of Warlock, Wolfhe and MFI, who can pwn Jad at 20 paces with just a bronze hatchet in their inventory. I'm not that sort of twitch player! > The next best thing that I can do is kill Vyrewatch and collect their corpses. I'm a little bamboozled by the maths here, but each 50 corpse burnt at the Columbarium means +10 on your minimum hit against any future Vyrewatch. The most you can burn for this effect is 500, which gives you 50+ bonus on your hits. See why I'm confused? Even by my maths 10 x +10 doesn't equal 50. I'm going to wait on that until someone points out what I've misread and what the real bonus is. The important thing for me is that there is a bonus! As Vanstrom is Vyrewatch, that will mean that I hit him harder with each successful lobby of a blisterwood stake. Happy days! Killing and burning 500 vyrewatch is just as boring as it sounds. It's the sort of grind that Jagex have been anxious to distance themselves from as late. But this was ninja-ed into the game before that ethos hit us. It's a definite 'watch the telly while you grind' activity. I've been keeping myself amused with Runeshark (Simon and James) and Born for PvM's highly amusing series. Beyond that, it's been Skype and unravelling the intricacies of Jethraw's love life, or chatting in Canting. I was rocking Fred's Bandos armour out there though. I'd been camped out in Meiyerditch, using the medallion to bank in Burgh de Rott, when Warlock found me. Ok, it wasn't rocket science for that particular hunt. I'd just told Canting that I was killing Vyrewatch in Meiyerditch, when he arrived, trailing effervescent bubbles from his mage staff and 120 Dungeoneering cape alike. He's certainly a very noticeable man. He'd come to tell me that I was fighting in the wrong place, but I had more pressing concerns. I'd been watching my hiscores and I knew what was about to happen. Take that Vanstrom! It's going to take you 10 more hits to pwn me next time! Woot! Seeing as my pony was dead and Warlock was having to carry my scrolls in order for me to pick up one last corpse, it was patently time to bank. We zoomed off to Burgh de Rott, where Warlock repeated his assertion that I was killing Vyrewatch in the wrong place. He wanted me to follow him. Following Warlock is often a mixed blessing. Sometimes you can end up in magical, secret places that you didn't even know was in the game. Sometimes you can end up facing down a monster that is distinctly bigger than you and the air between us filled only with my expletives and cries of 'Warlock! I'm going to kill you!' Nevertheless, it's always an adventure and worth the trip on the Magical Mystery Tour. I swear that he spends most of his days out exploring for venues to take people sight-seeing. Over the years, I've learned to just go, in the hope of wonders, and only resist if he's asking me to get my best armour and a load of Sara Brews out of the bank. That's an obvious indicator that here be dragons and to say 'no' in your firmest voice. On this occasion, he was only handing me a Ring of Duelling and sending me to Mobilising Armies. What was wrong with the Burgh de Rott bank, I don't know. Some logic exists only in the mind of Warlock. But we were in the MA bank and he was trading me. I was given more prayer potions than seemed safe in the circumstances. I tried to return them, on the basis that I have hundreds of prayer potions in my bank, but he was adamant and hurrying me. I was told to bring an extreme super set. I was nervous. Satisfied with my inventory, he instructed me to teleport to Darkmeyer. Madness! That's where Vanstrom lives! But Warlock had already gone. I stormed after him. "I'm not killing Vanstrom! I still have hundreds of Vyrewatch to kill first!" I informed him, in stern resolve. He simply had me follow him. We were right to Vanstrom's door and I was complaining loudly to MFI about Warlock in Skype. (MFI was doing more laughing than actual sympathy, it has to be said.) Warlock stood on Vanstrom's doorstep and directed me, "Now kill Vyrewatch." Ah. There is more to Darkmeyer than a boss. There are, for example, dozens of high level Vyrewatch swarming all over you, with a prayer altar and a bank right next to you. No more waiting around for my single Mieyerditch low level Vyrewatch to respawn. It was all I could do to grab corpses in time for the next one to be attacked. It amused Warlock. There are lots of positives about getting your Vyrewatch count in Darkmeyer - bank, altar, speed and vengeance notwithstanding. There are also negatives. There are about nine different types of corpses, so they're not stacking in one neat pile. After an hour there, I had ten bank spaces made up of different corpses and that cannot be sanitary, when I also have my food in there. I was going to get all 500 before I started the burning (mostly because I had Fred's Bandos, which would be going back), but I started to really lose the will to live. A change of scenery was clearly necessary. The first time you burn Vyrewatch, it's quite exciting. There are colours everywhere and things spiralling. You see the ghost of the Vyrewatch rise like a little angel to whichever afterlife awaits the souls of the undead. The tenth or even the twentieth time, it's still vaguely distracting, in a good way. By the 100th, you're wondering what sadistic force in Jagex Towers did this to you. The Columbarium is in the middle of nowhere. There is no quick and easy way to get to it. The combined Runescape geek knowledge of myself, MFI, Jethraw and Tabt couldn't devise one. MFI suggested slayer rings; I tried the fairy ring by the mushroom patch; ultimately it boiled down to just running back and forth between Canifis and the cellar deep underneath Paterdomus. Even the dialogue described it well - 'you tramp down the stairs'. I did a lot of tramping that night. Over 300 Vyrewatch souls flew up into the ether and took my sanity with them. On the bright side, there were the rewards from the keys! I was wearing a ring of wealth, so got some nice sundries, like rune bars and platelegs. I also snagged some stuff that's usually only accessible from clue scrolls, like a trimmed black plateskirt and Guthix platelegs. It went a long way to reimbursing the cost of the magic pyre logs that I bought from the GE. That was particularly true of the trimmed black plateskirt, which I think is my most profitable sell ever. Not a bad mark up, eh? On something that I was expecting 2.4k on! My trip to the Columbarium was also broken up by the lovely Fred Gwyar. He ostentaciously came to reclaim his Bandos armour, but he'd also come bearing gifts. He had a couple of items for my treasure chest, as I collect the things to put in it. He'd got the Bandos body, from the blessed ranging set, and a dragonshield decoration. <3 I've bought the rest of the Bandos dragonhide, but I was disappointed to note that I couldn't add the decoration in there. It's not a POV item. I'll give it back to him, when I next see him. <_< In other news - thank you all who helped test my Runescape Hiscores Excel Tracker. It's been fine-tuned and the next part is now up: Part 2: Averages Table in your Runescape Excel Hiscores Tracker. Merci beaucoup, Fred, for the banner!

Let's just say that it's all about Summoning at this stage. I've already used up all of my blue, crimson and green charms. I have over 200 gold ones, but I'm waiting for the tortoise shells to fall in price. Or the pouches to overtake them in price, one of the two. All Penguin Points, random xp lamps and Troll Invasion points are going on Summoning. Once that is level 90, all bets are off and I can start training fun things again, like Runecrafting. Merci beaucoup, Fred, for the banner!

I've been canting with a fellow Slammer named Convicious. He has level 1 in all of his skills, but his mind has turned to the major thing that concerns us all as we're starting out - money! He asked my advice on the various means of gaining it, so he can choose the best one for himself. He has 100k in the bank already, but wants to expand on this. This got me thinking about the sheer variety of methods to become the richest person in Gielinor. Please comment with any that I missed, as Convicious is reading and still has his decision to make. Farming: This is my number one method of making money. The higher that you go, the more lucrative your crops. Take, for example, the cactus spine. You get three of those each harvest and together they're worth 20k. Every 70 minutes, you can do a farming run and gather crops from several allotments. Shove these on the GE and watch the pennies grow into piles of cash over time. The bigget money spinner is, of course, the herbs. Some farmers don't even bother with the vegetables and flowers, just rushing around to get the herbs. Again the higher you go the more herbs you get each harvest. The trick is to keep an eye on the herb prices, then plant what everyone is buying at the time. In addition, the harvest from trees sells very well, particular when you get to palm trees and papaya trees. Slayer: This one relies upon your drops, but you can make a decent living off smaller drops like the aforementioned herbs. I know this is a route favoured by Zach. Also recommended by Fred. Monster killing: This isn't for me. Most of my mindless slaughter comes via slayer. But the likes of Zach, Warlock and Kicker get rich off killing monsters. It's the same source as the Slayer wealth. Flipping and Speculating on the GE: This is one for the mathematically minded, ie the Egghebrechts of this world. To start off, make Grand Exchange Central your friend. Then follow patterns in buying and selling to turn into an entrepeneur. There's way more to it than this, but I'm not mathematically minded. Ask Egg. (Egg has confirmed this, though states that he's too lazy to use GEC. LOL) PvP: Going into a PvP world, or up the Wild, and killing each other for profit. I'd rather run a mile in the opposite direction, but Grief makes his living this way. Miscellania: You can get very rich by completing the requisite quests and managing your kingdom. OnYx wrote a lovely guide all about how to do that. Mining and Smithing: This is a favourite of Daz Rhyfelwr. He mined loads of stuff, turned them into bars and sold them. By the time he was onto mithril bars, he was able to afford full dragon. Fred has also recommended this. Anymore? Give me your suggestions and I'll add them to the list (with a credit to you, of course!). Update: I erroneously said that Convicious is new player. He's not. Here are his stats: But please note that he only has 100k to start his bank with. Shopping: (Suggestion by Helm Lardar) After a few shops have been unlocked, it is one of my favourite ways to make money. The general run picks up vials from Taverly, Lunar Isle, and Shilo Village, Battlestaves from Zaff and Baba Yaga, Unfinished broad bolts and arrows from one slayer master (Duradel), and raw bird meat from Oo'glog. Finally, brewing mature Greenman's ale (One Million a week for that alone, thank you). Each run can be done once a day and probably makes 500k-1M. Task System: (Suggestion by Fred) And start to do the task system, easiest money ever to begin the game. Oak Chopping: (Suggestion by Fred) Those training Construction need their oak logs; even more so if you've already turned them into planks at the sawmill. Expensive and time-assuming, but you'll triple your money in return. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oh and here is me showing off in more promethium armour: I didn't get to keep it though. It Sleeppin's award at the end of a dungeon and he let me wear it for the minute it took for the dungeon to end. I looked posh though, don't you think?

With worlds 117 and 77 down, it seemed that I was never going to get a Dungeoneering team together. Everyone in Canting was either fighting Armadyl or else politely telling me 'no'. I considered some solo dungeons, but they're not nearly as much fun. I hung out at the GE, cleaning herbs and selling them instead. But then MFI came onto Skype and I glomped him with the need to come and take his Bandos back. It was making me all nervous sitting in my bank. What if a dragon was to fly over Varrock and scorch the GE? He'd lose that armour and it would all be my fault. He agreed to come and meet me. I dutifully traded him his full Bandos. MFI was all, 'yes! That's my Bandos! I'd recognise it anywhere!' *Accepts trade* (Though with some tell-tale laughing in my ear.) I decided to be nice and return it for real. After all, this was as much for me as him! I still have Tabt's claws though, as I haven't seen her since Friday to return them. ;_; I'd just asked MFI if he wanted to do a dungeon, when Sleeppin logged on. Bingo! Instant three person Dungeoneering team! We did a couple of floors, rejoicing in the double XP, before Zach logged on and joined us. Then Teacuptime too; with Josh replacing MFI several hours later. In short, this was the beginning of a marathon Dungeoneering session, which lasted for around ten hours. Along the way were the usual highs and lows of such things. One of the more bizarre was a really entertaining glitch that I witnessed. I'd just left a puzzle room, which MFI was undertaking. It was the one where you have a matrix of pedestals and you have to outwit the buzzy ball thing, in order to place a crystal on the central lode. The trick to completing it is to jump out, leave your gatestone on a pedestal, then step off. Go along another row, to lure the ball, then tele to your gatestone. This MFI had done and he was about to leap onto another pedestal, when I teled to the home room. To my surprise, MFI was still there on my screen! I watched him, in mid-air, continue the leap that he'd started in the puzzle room. He landed in the supplies table and stood there. MFI in the supplies table. I was giving a running commentary on this, so he stood on the central platform listening and waiting for me to produce the picture. As far as he was concerned, he'd never left the puzzle room. I was with his doppleganger! As soon as he left the platform, he just disappeared from the centre of my table. It was very funny and very weird. I also swapped my gorgonite 2h for the same in promethian, now that I have the level to be able to wield it. That was a bit of a faff, as I had to wait for a dungeon which provided me with four prom ores. I then consulted the Runewise Dungeoneering Potions app (the essential companion to any marathon Dungeoneering session! I had it open throughout) for a way to boost to 98 smithing. Next it was a run through several rooms, in search of a farming patch, with my lycopus seed. MFI recommended that I just replaced the home room altar with one, as we were close to finishing. I did that. Bit of farming, herbloring and drinking later, I was finally able to smith my own, pretty promethian 2h sword. Woot! I then grabbed some food and announced to MFI and Sleeppin, with all due apologies for the wait and thanks for their patience, that I was ready to come and do the boss. MFI blithely informed me that he'd soloed said boss, while advising me on farming patches. :D Posing with my new sword! L-R: Me, Zach, Sleeppin and Teacuptime (MFI was there too, but he must be under one of the others.) At the end of it all, I had to retire with a headache, but I was clutching a shiny, new level to my bosom: 91 Dungeoneering ftw! When I'd been planning my weekend, 90 Dungeoneering was the goal. 91 was a pie in the sky ideal outcome. I'm really pleased that I managed to achieve it, though the double xp made that a lot easier. It has all reaffirmed my belief that Dungeoneering is only fun when you're in Skype, chatting with the friends you are doing the Dungeon with. Otherwise, it's just a chore. Thank you to all who did these dungeons with me, for hours on end, yesterday. :) The final tally gave me a double look too. I got over 700k Dungeoneering xp in one day! A bonus of all of that is it moved Dungeoneering well away from the bottom of my skills set. This means that it stops leeching Tears of Guthix points, which are always better spent on things like Summoning and Slayer. I can't believe that, in the course of one weekend, I got six level 90s and a level 91. :) I always said that I'd finally get my Construction cape, when I'd got all of the other skills in the 90s. Summoning, I'm coming to get you.

When I was a kid, noobing my way around Lumbridge, the highest combat level in Gielinor was 126. It was a little intimidating to see someone like that. They seemed up there in the Gods and too scary to talk to in banks, Now I'm one of them, it suddenly seems that little bit less; though wonderful to possess! I wooted, it has to be said, when I got it. I was in a Dungeon with friends: Zach, Teacuptime, Tanyakins and M Sword500. Level 90 strength had been slowly creeping up on me for a day or two, but training it in Dungeoneering meant an even slower haul. Nevertheless, I got there! This was the final piece in the jigsaw to nudge me away from 125. I got congratulated by the invisible narrator, before the rest of Canting had time to join in. It was all rather lovely. :) (Well, apart from Teacuptime getting killed in the middle of it. That wasn't lovely. :) ) This weekend has been all about dungeoneering. There's a bonus xp thing on certain activities, so while bosses like Nex and the God Wars dudes are full of psychopathic players looking for 1.2b drops (I'm looking at you, Warlock and Killer), the rest of p2p Gielinor are in Daemonheim. I started with a couple of solo dungeons, before Cossack answered my call for a duo. Unfortunately, he's f2p at the moment, so I had to go there. It was a lot of fun. We rushed all the low level dungeons, insulting each other constantly over Skype. MFI joined the call, then joined us too. We went from floor 1 to 27, in a single marathon session, averaging about 2-5 mins per floor. MFI and I waiting for Coss to finish making hot chocolate IRL. These bloody Slavs, always slinking off. >:D What I hadn't sussed, until MFI did the maths, was that f2p wasn't getting the double bonus. It was a members only thing. We were also being penalised because everyone in the dungeon was over 90 combat. That took away about half our xp. Instead of playing for double, we were playing for half. :) Much as I love Coss to bits, that wasn't much inducement to stay in f2p. I told him that I'd remain until floor 30, but he was going abed anyway. He said his goodnights and left, taking his hot chocolate with him. MFI disappeared into the realm of Transformice, while I sought another team to have me. I met Sleeppin there. He's now our newest member of Canting and he fit in straight away. He was calling out for floor 29 large. I managed to lure Zach into joining us, then Sleepin came into our Skype call too. It was a fun dungeon, so we were eager to do another. Teacuptime came to join us too. Unfortunately, Sleeppin was called away, but Tanya and M Sword filled the breech. We set off again with five people, on floor 33, and I was amazed by the Dungeoneering xp that I got at the end of it. 139k! :o Moreover, it was one of the best dungeons that I've done in ages, mostly because everyone there was also in Skype. We were having a laugh, as we completed the map. Teacuptime achieving divinity with the addition of just one primal warhammer. This left me with just 36k xp until level 90 Dungeoneering. I couldn't wait to do it this morning, so rushed to world 117 Daemonheim. I hooked up with a team made up of strangers there. They were a decent enough team, but our dungeon was coloured somewhat for me by the fact that I died three times. It's harder to co-ordinate via text and so at least one of those was a case of miscommunication. Lord Renrage was keyer and he was good at allocating people to doors and rooms as required. But he also trusted people to use their own initiative to get there, in rooms which weren't cleared unless there was a guardian door. Naturally I failed big-time at this, often because I was being mobbed by multiple combat modes. This is me. I generally can't cope with a single combat attack, being prone to be wearing the wrong deflect prayer and all. I can't blame anyone else, because each time it was me dying through bewilderment or not understanding what I should be doing. I prefer the keyer to be a member of Canting, who all know to factor in my incompetence at life. Also the team were all high combat, which meant that every creature in there was high level too. Once Mayz u sily, Readtherunes and Fab_Delicia were piling something, it didn't last long. Neither, generally, did I. :D Nevertheless, I got 90 Dungeoneering! :D I have enough tokens for that necklace. With Respirte and D1d extolling the virtues of it, then I might just get one.

Where do I even begin on a day like this? I suppose where I started then - with the Fight Caves. The first rule of Fight Caves is Don't Attempt to Enter Fight Caves Without an Expert Checking Your Inventory. (This is obviously at noob level. For the real pros, I think there's something about never mentioning Fight Caves, unless you're pwning Jad with just your big toe and you're filming for YouTube.) I satisfied the beginner's requirements by letting Zach see my outfit and the contents of my bag. I wore an Armadyl Chestplate and Plateskirt, both loaned to me by Ix Choco xI; an amulet of fury, loaned to me by Zach; an archer's ring, loaned to me by MsClick; the rest was my own: a slayer helmet, Ava's Alerter and ranger boots. My main weapon was a rune crossbow with 1121 broad bolts (400 of which had been loaned by Choco). I also carried 257 diamond bolts, full Guthans and an Enhanced Excalibur, though the latter two were primarily for healing purposes. In addition, I had a single panic shark, ten Sara Brews, four Super Restores, four prayer potions and an extreme super defence potion. I wish I'd taken more panic sharks. MFI, reviewing the inventory several waves in, wished I'd taken more super restores. Nevertheless, this inventory got me all the way to Jad with much of it still untouched. The worst thing, in my opinion, about Fight Caves is the endurance aspect. Fending off 61 waves of increasingly hostile foes can take a bit of strategy, but mostly it involves not dying of utter boredom. By about wave 50, I was vaguely contemplating just suiciding to get it over. My saving grace was the Skype call keeping me entertained, as well as Canting chatting away. It's harder to type than to speak in this situation, so much of my own communication was happening verbally. MFI, Tabt, Egghebrecht, Audioworm, Zach, Whiskas and several others were alternately encouraging and laughing at me, as four hours of waves went on. One of the funniest moments came with the panic shark. This is precisely what it says on the tin. It's the shark that you eat, when you are stressing out too much to get your head around the complications of Sara Brews. Last time I was there, it was nommed in wave 8. This time I was all the way to wave 16, when mental equalibrium meant getting that shark down my throat right now. Then I felt like a noob. I was sure that pros didn't eat their panic shark until about wave 62, when it was Jad that they were facing down. Zach assured me smoothly that it was progress waiting until wave 16. I wasn't convinced. "But when do you eat your panic shark?" I plainitively asked. Zach calmly responded, "Whenever I want to eat my panic shark." It doesn't sound as funny in the telling, but at the time his tone just made it. Especially when I suspect that pros like Zach don't even take a panic shark. Panic shark became a kind of buzz phrase of the day. It was to emerge in much scarier, darker circumstances later on, when the Fight Caves were just a distant memory. I had entered the caves with several combat skills approaching level 90. First amongst them was range, which I got while fighting one of the level 360 mage dinosaur things. The above picture captured as much of the moment as I could, as the alert scroll flashed and was gone. I simply had more pressing worries at the time. However, a few bolts later, he was dead and I was able to rest for a bit, while snapping some pictures. Thus proving that sod all used to happen at this level range, before the advent of Dungeoneering and the recent Dominion Tower. And still the Fight Caves waves went on, and on, and on, and on. Then suddenly it was time! I had killed one 360 and the other was trapped. I sat in an absolute dead calm, in perfect safety, systematically working through my provisions and strategy. I reminded myself that Jad stomping the ground meant protect from range, while Jad rolling a fiery ball along his neck meant protect from mage. I should never ever go close enough for protect from melee to be necessary. I over-potted Sara Brews, so that my hitpoints were well above 1000, then enough super restore that my other stats were the best they could be. I sipped a hearty gulp of extreme ranging and extreme defence potions. I could survive a single mistake, as Jad wouldn't be able to one-hit me. All it would take then was to remain calm and regain control of my prayers. That's what killed me last time. I made a single mistake and died, but we learn from these However, last time, I also had MFI calmly speaking encouragement and tips via Skype. In the sort of gentle monotone that you use on the terminally spooked, he'd say things like, 'prioritise control of your prayer over eating', 'stay calm' and other useful things. It had nearly worked. Last time, I'd failed because I mistook leech mage for deflect from mage, as the icons are so similar. That's what killed me, though I died in wonderful serenity. This time, I stared at those icons before I ran out. I would not (and did not) make that mistake again. I waited for a gap in the vibrant conversation, then called out my position. There was a chorus of well wishing, both in Skype and in Canting, and I dashed out. The 360 died quickly, then Jad arrived. This I announced in Skype, more well-wishing, but then the discussion about national anthems went on. This was a much busier call than it had been last time, so there was no MFI keep me rigidly calm. Jad was nearly half dead, I was glancing to see if the healers were coming out, while I changed prayer. My mind was on absolute adrenaline fuelled, semi-panicked red alert. It suddenly occurred to me that I hadn't swapped from broad bolts to diamond bolts. I went to say this, feeling the panic rising, but the conversation was going on. It felt rude to interrupt. Did the lack of bolt swapping matter too much? I was starting to panic and I didn't even see what attack Jad was doing. I could see something falling. Was that a ball or a boulder? I was on protect from range. At the 11th hour, in complete panic attack, I swapped to protect from mage, just as the boulder landed on my head. I died. In the post-match analysis, Choco called it correctly. I died because I panicked. I could add a couple more details. I panicked because I took my eye off the ball - I was worrying more about bolts than prayers, then about being impolite in interrupting a conversation. It all took mere seconds to get it wrong, after four hours of stamina getting there. What I've taken from this is that, when the inevitable next time comes, I ask someone like MFI to come into a quiet call with me, so that I'm being kept calm. So that diamond bolt type panic-flashpoints are nipped in the bud before they overwhelm me. I panic and that simple fact needs to be as much part of my planned strategy, as noting the attacks and packing my inventory. 90 Slayer FTW! To add salt into the wounds, I left the Fight Caves with just a few hundred xp until 90 Slayer. I went back in to finish the task, but that left me just 71xp from the level. I had to go back to Kuradel and get a hellhound task just to get there! Can you spot me in that picture? I can practically guarantee that I'm not the person you think I am. Did you look at the dude in the penance torso and Ardy cape, safe in the knowledge that I'm currently unable to wear my quest cape? I would have too. But that's wrong. I'm the one in full Bandos and dragon claws. :D To work out how that happened, we have to reverse to Falador immediately after the Fight Caves. I was there because that's where Choco was and I had 31m gp worth of his armour on me. He joked, "What Arma? I didn't loan you any Arma!" And I was O.O.... you did... He laughed and accepted the trade. I still had 400 broad bolts left, so I returned that loan too, along with the armour, despite Choco's protest that this was a gift. We stood in Falador town centre blowing kisses at each other, while those in the Skype call were still commiserating at the Fight Caves failure. I think MFI must have felt really sorry for me, because he checked my location, then came to join Choco and I. He'd brought with him full Bandos and traded it to me, as an aid to going and getting not only 90 slayer, but defence, attack and strength as well. All four were within just a few thousand of levelling. Tabt was hearing all about this and suddenly she was there too, also trading me. I looked sooooo posh! It cheered me up immensely! MFI was going to loan me his fury too, but I still had Zach's, as the latter wasn't on-line as the final blows had come. I thanked Choco, MFI and Tabt, then hurried off to Kuradel and the hellhounds. One single dead dog later, I had my Slayer level. :) That wasn't nearly the end of it, because I still had those other combat skills teetering on the brink of levelling. After a quick pause for noms, I was soon in there. Wow! That was a lot; and another list which wouldn't have existed before Dungeoneering! But the choatic rapier had meant that I wasn't training my combat levels equally, as I had before. Usually getting defence, attack or strength means that the others will also level within seconds. Not this time. With the hellhound task completed, I still had 17k before my attack level and 65k before my strength. Kuradel gave me black dragons, which momentarily confused me. It had been so long since I last had them for a task, that I'd forgotten where they were. Out of the myriad of suggestions in Canting, I chose Zanaris for its proximity to the bank. But I couldn't remember how you got into the chicken's lair. In Skype, Respirte, Zach and I were working it out. It had something to do with a chicken, we knew that. I went on a slaughter spree in the farm to the east of the River Lum. It might have been slight overkill to attack level 1 chickens with dragon claws, in full Bandos, but I ended up with an inventory with seven raw chickens and seven eggs. I took an egg and a raw chicken to the Evil Chicken's Lair. Zach called it correctly. It was the raw chicken that gained me access. Of course, with all the dragon bones etc to collect, I was having to make frequent trips in and out of that lair. It soon became apparent that seven raw chickens was not going to be adequate. I spoke up in Skype, "Zach, you know you're not doing anything?" Pause for a snort in response. "How would you like to leave God Wars, go to Lumbridge, kill loads of chickens, bring them to me in Zanaris, then put them in my bank for afterwards?" Zach suggested that, as he was occupied by Nex and some key thingies (he explained it properly), I might want to fetch my own dead chickens. I agreed, then considered it. "Respirte, you know you're not doing anything? How would you like to...?" "I'm not even logged onto Runescape at the moment." "Ok." "Ember..." This went on for a while, with no-one appearing keen to drop everything to facilitate me being a lazy nub. But it amused me and allowed the black dragon task to go on with entertainment. The beautiful thing was that, just when I was down to my last chicken, Zach announced that he was currently buying some for me. This was a while later and he had finished what he was doing, so figured he'd get my chickens, while he was there anyway. While I wooted, Respirte suddenly appeared. He'd been engaged in the same thing, purely coincidentally, when Zach had spoken. I ended up with nearly 50 chickens between them, though they were fully reimbursed with mithril hatchets, swords, eggs and chocolate cake. Zach and Respirte = :D Moreover, I was finally closing in on that attack level! Along with a similar, Dungeoneering inspired list of things I could now wear. This left me with a problem though, because I only wanted to train strength now, but my weaponry wasn't brilliant for the task. I had Tabt's dragon claws, but she and MFI had advocated their use only for the special. Zach reiterated this advice now. I read out my options. When everyone had stopped laughing, Respirte suggested that I go and repair my choatic rapier. I checked out Daemonheim's trader, but I didn't have enough tokens for the cheap option. Everyone agreed that paying 2m wasn't worth it for the expensive option, though Zach did muse that I would make that back in drops. In the end, I returned to the black dragons wielding an Enhanced Excalibur, must to the amusement of all listening. It took forever for each dragon to die. Literally five minutes or so. It occurred to me that I should have just bought a strength weapon from the GE, while I was out there, which I could sell back later. The lads roared with laughter. "Yep, that would have been sensible," agreed Zach. I swapped it for my dragon skimmy on the next run out. This was only slightly better. However, the only danger appeared to be boredom and the loss of prayer potions. It was taking so long, that I was using a whole pot per dragon. Every so often, someone would post a photo in the Skype channel. I'd flick to see, then back to Slaying. It was no big deal. I was never there long enough to sustain any damage in game, let alone enough of it to start worrying. I'd been doing that all evening. If I was safely sheltered, I'd even been doing it in Fight Caves. This was probably the 100th picture that I'd glanced at this session. I was there for a second or two, flicked back and stared in shock at the screen. I was just in time to see Merch Gwyar crumbling to the ground, dead beneath the claws of a dragon. I have panicked before in-game. I'm infamous for it. Canting members assign people to stop me panicking, if it's unavoidable that I have to get involved in scary things, like PvP matches against Sal's clan. Jad had killed me earlier that day, because I had a panic attack. This is the way of the world. But if you think you've seen me panic before, then unless you were there last night, you have seen nothing at all. Dying is one thing; dying when you are wearing or carrying nearly 40m gp worth of armour and weaponry belonging to your friends is quite something else. Dying when you're in a location which requires a special item (chicken) to enter means that your friends are going to be delayed in answering any SOS. Dying in a place where high level dragons are prowling means that instant death could stalk the unwary person entering unprepared. I panicked. I seriously, unequivocally panicked. The entire Skype conversation just froze as my friends heard me. In Canting, the message was going out via Respirte. My mind had gone into a black mist. I could barely think. I was in Daemonheim, because that's the last place I'd been or something like that. I hardly even registered the fact that the three items that I'd retained were, in fact, the exact three that were fretting me so much. I had MFI's bandos and Tabt's claws in my inventory. I rushed to the bank and just stuffed them into it. Closing the bank, then realising that I still needed it open. Words flashed through my mind like, "Most of the deaths in Runescape happen because the person panicked." I tried to talk myself off the ceiling. I opened my bank again. I grabbed a slayer ring for the teleport, a raw chicken, an anti-fire and ten panic sharks. As I landed in Rellekka, I couldn't even remember withdrawing those supplies and pressing teleport. On some level, my mind must have been working perfectly, but on the conscious level, it was raw terror. I kept telling myself to calm down. It was only a game. Worst came to the worst, I would pay MFI and Tabt back. I'd even forgotten that their items were safe and sound in my bank now. They'd come with me into the respawned afterlife. I'd also forgotten to do that one fundamental thing: Sound an SOS in Canting. Get back up. Get more than one person on the case of survival. I glanced down. Respirte had long since done it for me. In Skype, Zach was calmly telling me that he was nearly there. Time sprang back into motion. I was already outside the Evil Chicken Lair with no recollection of how I got there. I sipped the anti-fire potion and applied deflect from melee. I entered the lair and tried to bless my grave. It wouldn't allow me to. I picked up my dragonfire shield first and held it. Part of my brain was screaming, "The dragon is going to kill me!" But it was quickly being drowned out by the rest of my mind calling me every noob under the sun. I slowly realised that I was now protected from all melee damage, as well as the dragonfire. It couldn't touch me; nor did it, as I retrieved all of my stuff and escape through the exit portal. The clock read a mere 12 minutes. It had taken just three minutes between death and everything being ok. It had felt like a life-time. Zach hadn't even had time to arrive, but he was probably coming from God Wars or Barrows or something. I think I must have frightened the life out of the entire of Canting, in chat and in call, because there was a flurry of reassurance. Zach decided to sign off for a bit to watch television. I'd probably just ruined his own fight. :) I was close to logging off myself. I was really trembling, plus feeling downright stupid for how much I'd lost the plot. I completely stripped everything from myself and my inventory and plunged them into the depths of my bank. Josh was having none of it. "Where are you, Merch?" He asked. I told him Zanaris bank. He went via the cocktail bar in the Gnome Stronghold and brought me several bottles of strong alcohol, plus some ready-made Drunk Dragon cocktails. I had the presence of mind to go back into the bank for my pointy green hat before he arrived. I met him with a lot of 'head in the sand' emotes, which I stopped doing with a couple of cocktails, bottle of whisky and a beer inside me. Pixel drinking ftw! Then he told me to grab a raw chicken and follow him. I was all 'O.O', but did as he asked. He took off to the Evil Chicken's Lair and waited for me outside. "Now let's go and see some dragons," Josh told me, "No-one picks on Merch!" It was such a lovely gesture, that I started laughing IRL. I cheered as he handed me the skin and bones of the dragon that had killed me. I was avenged! Josh then took my mind off things with a nice tour of Gielinor. He was doing an elite clue, so it meant lots of different locations, as I followed him around. The conversation was a little subdued, but only because it was gone 3am and we were both knackered. The companionable silence was nice too and we saw some wondrous things, like a unicorn lying down. I went to bed quite relaxed again, thanks to his efforts to cheer me up. Though MFI and Tabt's things are staying firmly in my bank until they come and retrieve them.

I'm focusing on Slayer at the moment. That's where my penguin points, troll invasion points etc are all going, though it seems that tomorrow's Tears will end up on Dungeoneering. Oh! I've also been actually training Slayer, just for a change. :D

I'm slightly amused by the fact that today's date is 011011. It looks like binary. My plans are the same old story that it's been for weeks (months in some respects). I want to get all of my level 89s up to level 90. As they're mostly combat related, this is going to be a joint effort. It's basically a case of training Slayer, which will also train the four combat skills. The charms that I gather from drops will go into Summoning. That just leaves that a resurrence of Dungeoneering to sort out. But I've seen Cossack back in game, so he will possibly be partnering me for that. If I wasn't faffing about with the 89s, I'd definitely be training Runecrafting. It's ridiculously close to the Holy Grail level of 91 now.

First of all, there was a record collection of Tears. I don't think I've ever had so many in one go before! Just over 11k. Then I worked out that I just needed two penguin points for my level. I inspected the polar bear in Fally, before spying the penguin in McGrubbor's Garden. Quick zoom over to Ardy and woot! Level 89 Slayer. Now to see what happens at higher levels...

There are two things that I want in life right now: level 89 slayer and the ability to beat that blasted vampire thing in Darkmeyer. (Vanstrom has turned into my Nomad Pt 2.) After considering all of my options, I realised that I could combine these goals. All I had to do was buy a load of dragon-bones. Training prayer time was now. It helped that the dragon bones are really cheap at the moment. I'm used to paying between 4k-6k for them, but I got mine for 2.4k. It took a few days for them all to arrive, but that was fine. According to Grand Exchange Central, they've since gone up again. I'd be crowing that I'm a bargain hunter extraordinaire, but being me, I messed up the maths. I bought 560 bones too many. They're still sitting in my bank. Shelley and I got to work. This happened: Then this happened: There's actually a week between those two pictures, but Shelley and I are creatures of habit and don't change our clothes much. >.> Level 92 prayer brings with it something quite pretty. Yes! It's the ability to meet those Bandos wearing spiky people in Soul Wars with a prayer that matches their prayer! So grown up! Quick check that it's working. Take that spiky Soul Wars people! Rawr! And woooootttt!! This is where all my cunning plans come to fruition, because I read a guide that said that Soul Split helps a lot with That Vampire. That's strike one, but strike two is slightly more involved. That led me into the jungle first, with a knife in my hand. I picked some calquat, then used my Ectophial to get to Port Phastysm. There I cheered at my utter ability to forget that I have things brewed in the basement under the pub. My Chef's Delight was more than done. I lobbed the top off the calquat and filled the insides with nice, refreshing, cooking level boosting beer. Home-made! Hurrah! A few guzzles of that, I was staggering somewhat between the bank and the range at the Cooking Guild. Drunk cooking is best, as a wise woman (Tabt) taught me weeks ago. Drunk cooking means that your level 92 is suddenly well over 95, so Summer Pies come out of the oven all crisp and smelling lovely. This left just one item to tick off my Varrock Elite Task list: go to Sennisten Temple and activate Soul Split. *smirk* So I went to see my old mate Vannaka, down in Edgeville Dungeon, with a huge, self-satisfied grin on my face. > : ( :glasses: *sigh* I traipsed all the way back to Edgeville. I didn't need to, because I had a glory around my neck. But I'm a noob. I grabbed my Varrock 3 armour from the bank and tried again. And here is where the second strand of my plans kicked in. First of all this happened: And then this happened THREE times: For a total of 150,000 slayer XP, all in one go. *happy dance* I promptly ran off to Ardy and killed the jade plant for another 2.5k slayer XP. That leaves me with just 15k until my next level. :D Tomorrow morning, I can use my Tear of Guthix on it, plus Wednesdays = penguin day. That would more than propel me to level 89 Slayer, though I could also take the old-fashioned route and just train Slayer. I have some mutated jandinkos to massacre. Now to go and read up about That Vampire again. -.-

I'm listening to a lot of Grace Petrie at the moment, so I've added that in to distract from the fact that this going to be a very boring update on Bonus XP Weekend. I've barely left the ZMI - Moonclan route! As soon as my farming run was done yesterday, I filled up my back with books and shattered heart rocks and off I went. I'm still on the 1.2 multipler and all of that has been 'spent' on Runecrafting XP. As I'm no good at chatting and Runecrafting at the same time, I tend to watch programmes on pop-up screens instead. I've been through Dr Who, Torchwood, several documentaries about September 11th 2001 (and related issues), another about the Holy Cross dispute (also having a tenth anniversary right now), QI, Mock the Week etc. However, I am nearly out of pure essence and I'm towards the bottom of the sliding scale. At 1.1, I'll be off Summoning, then into Slayer. Then I'll finally turn up in Canting Away. :( ZMI isn't known for its great conversation, especially when everyone is Runecrafting against the clock. But some things do keep recurring. The first are the complaints about teleports to Moonclan. Big tip of the day: If you don't want to be teleported, then switch off your 'aid assist' button. You'll find it under the icon that looks like two spanners (wrenches in American) crossed over. In there, there's another icon which looks like a First Aid box. Click that off and you won't even see the Moonclan requests. Also, if you're standing in the 'arrival' spot at ZMI, then that's where everyone is doing the group teleports. It's the teleport spot. Run around to the far side of the altar and you'll hardly get any at all. The second topic is the prevalence of bots and the efforts made to combat them. Note to anti-bot pwners - putting your marker plant or vexilium at the entrance trapdoor is nerfing normal people too. Instead of a single click, we have to right click around a mass of people and plants. It does slow things down somewhat. The cannons on the route are much better. We can run through them, but the bots can't. I can't quite get my head around the people who just hang out at ZMI, accusing everyone else of being bots. I understand (and thoroughly empathise with) their position on bots, but surely that's a waste of BXPW time? Their time counter will be dripping away and no-one's going to answer them. We're all too busy rushing against our own clocks and watching documentaries. Weird people. Drum-roll on the actual XP I've gained please! Friday Saturday Which has, so far, only led to one actual level, 92 farming. :D

I've also managed three hours of Runescape, wherein I got level 92 farming from my trees, followed by 116k Runecrafting xp. But, on the bright side, I have cleared the IRL decks now, so I can use the rest of my bonus xp over the weekend.

In between writing crate-loads of articles and being locked out of Runescape for nearly a week, I've hardly trained anything! :o The vague plan is still to get Summoning and Slayer up, then start nudging those 89s into 90s. But I really ought to be looking at BXPW! I've got my ess and my tree seeds (which need planting), but I haven't even thought about what I'll be otherwise doing. Slayer looks attractive, as I need to get that up, plus that equates summoning charms and will help with getting my combat levels up into the 90s too. I think I'll default to Runecrafting until the ess runs out or the counter goes to 1.1, then slayer. Or should that be the other way around? I don't know! It's too hot here and my brain doesn't work when it's hot. I'm like a DiscWorld troll in that respect. In the other news, I got a late birthday present today. It's off my wonderful friend, Alex Larder. My jaw is well and truly on the floor.

Here is how my hiscores sit at this moment in time. I'm focusing on those at 88 now. Slayer is going to be the main target, as that will bring in all of the combat ones too. The ultimate goal is, of course, to get them all to 90. My penguin points are currently all going to Summoning; Tears of Guthix are going to Slayer. Along the way, I'm doing dungeons whenever Coss can drag me away from the citadel. Unfortunately, I'm running out of floors that I can do. I've got floor 29 and floor 42 open, that's it.

I didn't set out to get 92 Firemaking. I'd just handed in a bag full of strange rocks (which do keep coming after you've completed the statue), so it was time to go and get some more. I often fairy-ring myself to Piscatoris at times like this, as four categories of rocks can be found there. You literally just have to wraggle your net in the water to get both fishing rocks; often getting the first before you've got any fish. Then cook the monkfish for the cooking rocks (more tricky, as that's not going to happen on the three or four fish you caught to get the fishing ones). Lots of wide, open spaces to start firemaking, for those rocks, then bimble over to the falconry area to catch kebbits for the rest of your life, in the hope of the always elusive hunter rocks. As it was, firemaking took forever. I'd amassed around 60-70k xp, burning maples, before they finally turned up. All of this was done weaving around a clan vexilum, which one of the fishers thought was fun to stick in the main firemaking routes. I could have hopped, but I felt it was better to just exclaim, "Meep!", every time I encountered it, then wove my fires around it. I checked my firemaking xp and noticed how close I was. I only need 76k to get the coveted adze! To me, the adze is the tool of high levelled players. Owning one is as much a status symbol, as it is practical. Only proper arsonists get one and it's also part of the Varrock Elite Diary. I. Can. Has. Pl0x! Goggie and Empty Entity have both spent the past couple of days highlighting the wonders of the Jandinko Lair. I'd promised them both, in separate conversations, that I'd check it out. It seemed that the opportunity was now staring me in the face. I grabbed a juju pouch thingie, that I'd bought when it was last bonus xp weekend, then took myself to the garden place (that I've never fully explored either). Having watched a video, that Goggie linked to me, I knew that the entrance was up by the jade vine plant, so off I went in the wrong direction. Because I'm a nub. Eventually I found it and got told off for trying to enter without talking to the NPC. Apparently I wasn't properly prepared with knowledge! *indignant face* I'd had two long conversations with Goggie and Empty Entity! How could I not be prepared with knowledge?!! Nevertheless some dude wanted to tell me himself. I listened patiently, then dropped down the rabbit hole. Curioser and curioser. There were two people already working hard in there. As this was my first time, and I didn't know the scope of the resources nor the etiquette, I asked if I was good to go or needed to hop. The lovely Sir Drumlord took me under his wing and showed me around, as well as inviting me to continue on in this world. It was fine. There were plenty of vines to go around. The xp was unreal! Each inventory worth of curly roots seemed to knock a huge chuck out of my remaining xp. I think I only had 6 or 7 runs before there were fireworks and I had the coveted level 92 firemaking. Woot! This meant only one thing for my immediate future! Yes! It was time to watch the last ten minutes of the documentary about Neopolitan Camorra, while continuing to chop and burn curly roots. So I did that, then bade goodbye to Sir Drumlord and ventured out into the real world. The GE and an All Fired Up Beacon Burning guide beckoned. I read and I bought supplies; then, once I was free of the conversation chaos of the GE, I logged into Canting and bounced excitedly over the chat in there. Setting up your beacons takes a very, very long time. I visited all of the ones that I needed to fix and gave presents to most of the beacon keepers. The dude who wanted the lava eel could just go whistle. I've long since lost my oily fishing rod and it looked like a lot of hassle to go and create Blamish Oil. As for the rest, it was a series of long treks out into Guthix forsaken 'hoods, including the Wilderness. I did it all on world 60, where a penguin was luring penguin hunters into the scary parts. That kept the PKers busy. While they were hunting people in default clothes with empty inventories, I was able to sneak along the western cliff-faces with my bag variously full of gifts, repairing materials and, finally, yew logs. I was only accosted once. A gang of around seven PKers rushed by, with ancient mage staffs and dragon claws aplenty. I naturally ran in abject terror. They drew level with me and just laughed, then went on. Yay? I did have some problems. The God Wars beacon was the biggest of them. The first time I went, it was to fix the windbreak. With the inclement weather and the wolves eroding my hitpoints, I arrived in a sluggish and bloody state. The windbreak was quickly fixed, but I then wanted to chat with the polar bear guard. I had done this at all of the beacons. If they talked to me, that means that they'd hold logs for me, as well as give me information about my beacons. Unfortunately, the biting wind and chill kept interupting. I'd speak and the polar bear would answer, but each time I tried to select anything from the next menu, I'd shiver and the conversation would be over. I gave up. My second visit there was to add logs to the beacon. I went to put them in, but quickly learned that the weather had left me feeling so drained that my stats were dipping horrifically. Most importantly, I didn't currently have the firemaking level to even put logs in there, let alone light them. I gloried back to Edgeville for a super restore potion, then made the long trek back. I was able to add my logs this time, but I'd come without a teleport, as I'd used the last charge on my glory the previous time. I was concerned that the weather would stop me home-teleporting, but it didn't. I was soon safe and sound in Lumbridge. Finally, I stood at the top of the level 40 Wilderness beacon, with the last of my logs dumped into the last holder. I was brave now that I wanted a PKer to kill me (it would get me back to civilisation faster and I had nothing on me to lose), but I was also looking at the time. It was gone midnight and I was wilting a little. I did want my adze, but after the hours it had taken to set up, did I really want to risk failure because I wasn't at peak mental capacity? Plus, if I held on, the likes of Warlock or Grief might come on, and they might be persuaded to escort me through the Wild and keep away PKers. >.> Teacuptime asked what logs I'd added. Yews. He also checked how many PKers I'd seen. I told him about that gang that had passed by, but there really hadn't been any others. He pointed out that I might not be so lucky next time. I should do the beacon run now. I trudged all of the way back to the level 13 beacon, where you're out of the Wild up there and can teleport. Then I used my duel ring to get to Mobilising Armies. From there to Oo'glog, where I dressed carefully in the bank. I put on my flame gloves and ring of fire; my agility top and legs; my boots of lightness; my glory and my green, pointy hat. I filled my bag with two sets of Trollheim teleports; two sawmills teles; Goblin Village sphere; games necklace; and a Super Restore. The rest of the bag was more yew logs. I started to run to the pools, then doubled back, took out a log and put in a tinderbox. Now I was ready! I leapt into the pool that raises your hp, then into the energy pool. While soaking in there, I told Canting that I was about to start and so wouldn't be responding. They wished me luck and I was off! This was my route, taken from the RS Wiki: Teleport to Trollheim, and run north of the God Wars Dungeon entrance and light beacon 12. Use a Lumber yard teleport and run east to light beacons 2 then 1. Use another lumberyard teleport and light beacons 3–5 by running west along the edge of the Wilderness. After beacon 5, teleport to Edgeville and light beacon 6. Run west to the Monastery and light beacon 7. Using a Goblin village sphere or running from Taverley/Falador, go to Goblin Village and light beacon 8. Use a Games Necklace or Combat bracelet to teleport to Burthorpe and light beacon 9 to the east. Teleport to Trollheim and light beacon 11 to the east. From beacon 11 use the shortcut into the wilderness. Run north and light beacons 10, 13 and 14. It all went without a hitch, with Empty Entity timing from 'I'm off' to 'woot' at 6.9 minutes. I didn't see a single PKer; and my first four beacons had me handing five yew logs to the keepers for maintenance. I was soon out of there, going west and squeezing through the gap to the castle thingie. Just on the other side of the stone, I was able to glory to Edgeville before a dragon singed me. I rushed to the palace and glomped the king. Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooootttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel so proud. :P