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Ocean 596

Trapped In Rivers Edge!

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~Adventures of River's Edge!!!~

Welcome to the Fake adventures of me being trapped in my own nebighorhood!Might as well begin,oh wait,rules of this topic:

No Flamming

No Spamming

No Rants

NO TRYING TO REPORT ME IF I PUT [email protected] IN MY STORYS!!!!

 

~Day One~

10:47 A.M. I wake up and find myself lieing on the floor,i go to my kitchen and find nothing to eat except,some expierd waffles,and it looks like they left the toaster,i might be able to eat breakfest if i don't get sick afterwards,so i pop in 2 waffles and put them back into the freezer,and then i began to eat the waffles,they acctually taste good.I go up to my parents room and find that they left there bed,so clumsy,how could they foret that?I snuggle into the bed and go to sleep.

2:39 P.M. I wake up and make a big yawn!I look outside and see a car parked outside,wonder who that could be,i go downstairs and see a famliy,not my own famliy,they ask me why i'm here.I tell them i was left behind after a move on accedent,they tell me that i could stay at the house for alittle bit and sleep in there extra bed,glad i have my luck"y charm and spell book,i found a new one on the shelfs when i went into my room which is now the famliys guest room,i open it up and find alot of new spells,none very usefull to get home,so i ask them if they have anything to eat,they said "no,were just putting some stuff into the house",damn,i have to eat rotten waffles again :yay: !!!!!

4:57 P.M. It's starting to get late I was at my friends house and he gave me one of his potions he was working on(note:i'm ACTUALLY studying real magic and potions),he didn't tell me what it was for,i drank the potion.

7:19 P.M. I watch some T.V. while eating a waffle(again),getting low on food,i don't think i'll make through the next day,i sit there,waiting for the famliy to come back,i hear a knock on the door i quickly grab my wand,go to the door,and see who it was,it was my friend,he asked if the potion did anything yet,i said no,he then said he had 2 things for me,but i could only have one,he had them behind his back in his hands,i chose the left hand,it was money,now i can go over to the grocrey store and but some food and not rotten waffles....

9:45 P.M. I lay in the guest bed,waiting to fall asleep,as soon as i do.....*BOOOMMM*A THUNDER STORM HITS!!!!It was so noisy it woke me up,so i wait for the next day to come

 

~Day Two~

8:47 A.M. I wake up and go downstairs i turn on the t.v. and watch a little morning cartoons,then i grab my scooter(did they leave most of the stuff behind?),and ride over to the grocrey store.

9:21 A.M. I go from shelf to shelf for stuff i need,then i came across something i needed.....CLOTHES!!!!No longer will I have to wear my Pajamas in public!!!!I grab 2 pairs of pants,4 shirts,1 pack of socks and some boxers,i buy my food,treats,and clothes and take my clothes into the bathroom,put on the clothes and go outside and go back home(have no idea how with all the grocreys :P )

12:41 P.M. My staomuch starts to rumble,i go grabbed some of the waffles,and throw them away...I then grab some eggs,sausage and french toast sticks and cook them just right and finally eat!

1:23 P.M. I go down to river and try to relax.....*Sigh*"This is all your fault,if alll this water didn't come in,i would still be with my famliy,oh,why am I talking to a river?thats just damn stupid!",I walk over to my friends house,he asked if the potion did anything yet Again,I still said no and then he gave me the other thing he had before,it was my Nintendo DS,I almost forgot i gave it to him!To bad i only have one game!But then he also gives me the charger and a wifi conection chip!This might be my chance out of here!Without a moment to spare i turn on the ds with the wifi chip in it.....*ZITTTT*,*SPARKKK*,*LOTS OF ELETRIC NOISESSS!!!!!*,*POOF!*,"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY DS!?!?!?!","U DROP IT IN A POOL OR SOMETHING?","Uh.....ya.","WTF!?!?!?!U IDIOT!!!!!!","I have a free fixing coupon..","I don't have a phone stupid....","Here u r!",*BEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP*,"AGH!!!!THE NOISE HURTS MY EARS!!!!DID U DROP THIS IN A POOL TOO!?!?!?!?!"........"Yes.....","Damn.Oh well,thanks anyway"

4:47 P.M. The Famliy comes by to drop off some more stuff and too see how I was doing,"I'm doing fine,i've got clothes food,and money now!","Thats great!","Sure is!"

4:56 P.M. The Famliy is still here they brought in a computer and said could use it,these fells like home more & more every day!But i also knew that i could not stay for very much longer,I go use the computer and find that my parents sent me a [email protected](lol e-m@il),they asked where i was,i said at the old place,they said they were at a gas station with no money and the car was broken(OH NOS!),I didn't think it would take this long to get home!!!!!

6:32 P.M. The Famliy is STILL here,I cook up some dinner,a turkey i bought at the store and some of my famous thanksgiving stuffing my famliy likes so much,when the famliy left with thanks for the dinner i go over to the computer to see if there was a new [email protected],there was,but this time,it sounded like i would never see my famliy again!They said they ran out of fourmula for my new born baby bro,hes starting to die from hunger,and then my famliy is getting low on food supply this was not good,I'll have to get there quicker then i excpected,but then i also heard that my dad caught a "Monster Snapalope!"!!!!HUZAH!!!Now they have something for dinner if they can cook it!

8:12 P.M. I heard a knock on the door,"Ugh...LOOK THE POTION HASN"T DONE ANYTHING SO STOP BOTHERING ME!!!!",but when i opened my eyes,it was not my friend,it was my Girl Friend!"Well if thats the way u wanna be fine!",then she stormed off,i slammed the door and went to get a drink,"I am such an idiot...."

11:32 P.M. I hold a BIG party in the house and thought it would never end,but then i saw someone i didn't know,some weird blue person,i was so sleepy i couldn't even see who it was,1 of my friends gave me a slap in the face,then i saw who it was,it was a police officer,i think i'm in biggggg doo-doo!

12:46 P.M. I sneak out of the house and then go over to my friends house he awnsers the door and i tell everything that happened,he then took me inside,he didn't say a word until we got to were he was going,it was a secert door in his bedroom,he had everthing we needed to survive for a whole week!Damn,thank god!!!I thought i was going to Jail!

 

~Day Three~

Edited by Ocean 596

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One, using damn isn't going to get you banned.

 

Two, if you're going to use the word "damn," use it properly.

 

Same goes with any word.

 

I... I really don't get it. I mean, one point you're running low on food supplies, thinking you won't be able to hold out, and then suddenly you have enough money for clothes, food, and luxuries?

 

And there are cars, yet some how there are absolutely no boats, or other means of floatation device to for them to come get you? There are also computers, but nothing that can float, go figure.

 

You also manage to cook a turkey with stuffing in under 2 hours... which isn't really possible for a thoroughly cooked turkey.

 

Also, you happen to live by yourself, but you mention having to sneak out of your house, which doesn't make sense, as no one is really stopping you there.

 

And I don't really see how the wands and potions come into this... Yet, atleast.

 

i think i'm in biggggg doo-doo!

 

Using such bad terms is what makes up a bad story. Try something more, well, "exotic."

 

Grammar and punctuation also make it quite easier on the eyes.

 

You've got quite a bit to learn.

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1. Use Correct Puncuation, Grammar(Grammer?), and use Spell-Check

2. Please work on sentence structure and capitizalation.

3. I didn't like it

4. Try harder to make your stories appeal to the Sals Members.

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I'm not going to lie, this story was bad. The beginning of the story didn't introduce half of the things necessary for me to understand what's going on. Spelling is bad, grammar is bad, the fact that you have random things in parenthesis about you studying magic is also bad.

 

The ending of Day Two was definitely the worst. First off, why was one of your friends over at your house when he/she was not mentioned before? Why was the policeman there? How did you manage to sneak out of your house over an hour later and avoid the policeman for that long? What's the point of 90% of this story?

 

It feels like you're just writing the first thing that pops into your head, which just makes this story random and stupid.

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Grammar(Grammer?)

Grammar.

 

I agree with what L0rd Vega has to say. Sorry... :rolleyes:

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I forgot what Gramar means :mellow:

 

Heres the next day(week sorta...)

 

~Day Four(Night)~

I slowly go drift into my dreams then i start to hear a voice,I could barley hear it.I tryed harder to hear,no voice was heard after that,after my dream faints away.I wake my friend up to see what was happening,he said it may be what the potion is going to do to me,but he also said he doesn't even know what the potion will do to me.Then i try to relax by playing my Nintendo DS,finally fixed.....But then i go back into my dream,the voice grows louder,maybe i should try talking to it."E'llo?Anyone here?",I hear a few words but barley hear,"What?Destiny?WAIT!I wanna know whats going on!!!"No more voice went through the dream.Then i try to think of what might happen.

 

~Day Nine~

9:37 A.M. We finally get out of the door,we see a cop car parked outside,"uh...Maybe we should go back into the secert room....."i said,"right behind ya buddy...."(short and simpe,i know :yay:<------I like using this smily :o )

11:17 A.M. We then smelt some yummy french toast,we then go out of the secert hideout,and find that the cop was gone,my friend told me to leave,just incase the cop comes back,i go back to my old house grab my backpack,pack it with some stuff,and then check my [email protected],my famliy said that newborn baby bro died from hunger my dad died from going out into the corner store and a monster snapalope's charged at him,probbaly for killing one of there famliy members....Then my baby bro died from screaming his head off for 5 hours,and shes hungry,tired,she has no one there for there....I told here how to survive off of the willderness,then i took off on my scooter.

12:23 P.M. I make it to my school,i walk through the ofice doors and then i fall to the ground,almost dead.

 

~Day ???(I'm K.O.)~

I finally hear the voice again,it's finally hear-able,i then ask what my destiny was,it wasn't really saying much because it was talking word by word,each word was said every 10.7 sec.,It says i will take on a new world,a new life,i then asked what kind of life it was going to be."It's........The......World........Of......Ru.....",The voice fadded away,"DAMN IT!!!JUST WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO HEAR ABOUT A GOOD NEW LIFE!!!!"I finally wake up

 

~Day Twelve~

IDK the time at this point :yay: . I wake up and find myself lieing in the nurses office coverd with a blanket."Where am I?"I asked,"Ur in the nurses office,u were in a 3 day coma from hunger,u could have been parlyzed once u woke up,luckly ur not!Angels must be looking after u.",Then i slowy thought to myself,then it was clear,'my famliy....' i said to myself,I also start to hear a mom and a kid at the office desk,i listen to the chat,"I refuse to go to a school thats PUBLIC!"The boy said,"Oh come now,it's the way i met ur father!"the woman said,"I still don't wanna go to school with this stupid and annoying kids,i wanna go to school that has kids with as much money as me!"I then come storming out of the nurses office,"HEY!!!I'm not stupid!I'm the smartest kid in my class,2ndly,I may be annoying sometimes,but not always!SO DON'T EVER INSULT ME EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!","WHOA!!!!!Clam down!Jeasus cripes!Sry!!!!Jezz!!!!!","U BETTER BE!!!!"

Going to update Day Twelve once i can think some more parts of the story!See ya!

 

~Ocean :(

Edited by Ocean 596

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To be blunt, this is a terrible story.

 

It has no real plotline, and it sounds like you just put in the first thing that came to your mind into it.

 

And grammar means proper punctuation, spelling, and capitalization.

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To be blunt, this is a terrible story.

 

It has no real plotline, and it sounds like you just put in the first thing that came to your mind into it.

 

And grammar means proper punctuation, spelling, and capitalization.

this is real life life has no plotline live with it

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To be blunt, this is a terrible story.

 

It has no real plotline, and it sounds like you just put in the first thing that came to your mind into it.

 

And grammar means proper punctuation, spelling, and capitalization.

this is real life life has no plotline live with it

 

No, this is a story.

 

Good stories have some form of a plotline.

 

This has none.

Edited by -Logan-

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watch,just watch,a plotline will come!

 

~Day 13(Night)~

12:34 P.M. "eh?oh,great....the same dream.....",but when I heard the voice this time,it was clear,no pauses,no nothing,just a clear voice,"e'llo?u there?","......","Hello?","......What do u want?......","tell me about my new live",fine,if u will leave me alone after this.....","ok","fine,let's begin.A world far from here is in great danger,a knight is destroying it all,a knight that has no soul or heart,one that has no life,one who doe's not need life,he is....Zamorak,a evil wizard,he is destroying all that we know and love in this world,this world....is runescspe,you must fight him to his limits,battle untill 1 warrior falls to the ground!U must do anything u can to stop him!!!And +,he woke me up from my nap :P .....","But how do i get to Runescape?","I think ur friends potion might do the trick....","The potion?Oh no,thats useless","try it again,it might work,now leave me to my bisnuess!"

 

~Day 14~

6:44 I drink the potion and fell a wierd tingle in my body,not much happened :/ ,"*Sigh*,i knew it wouldn't do anything....",I start to rumble,i fell a globe go around me and i close my eyes,i open them and find myself in a sacerd battle field,"What is this place?",*Boom!*,"Who's there?",*Boom!*,*Boom!*,I quickly pull out my wand,*BOOOOMMMM!!!!!!*,"WHO DARES TO ENTER MY CHAMBER???!!!!???"

 

Will i escape this thing or will i die!?!?!Tune in tomorrow for the full story!Maybe even in video!!!!1

Edited by Ocean 596

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watch,just watch,a plotline will come!

 

I'm seriously doubting that.

 

Oh well, try your best. I'm already disappointed overall, as this isn't even a decent story.

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Haha,very funny,u just wait and see!!!!Read the post before this one i made!

Edited by Ocean 596

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....eh...what?i stayed in present and then runescape.....Read the post before this one i made!

Edited by Ocean 596

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This story is a Cactus ranked story.

Oh, and if you know the sals member cactus, you'll understand the ranking. His stories are below negative infinity.

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Im gonna have to agree with my cousin (Demented).

Seriously, this story suks.

Oh, and douch aint a cuss word.

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Um, you kinda just said the cuss word straIGHT OUT THERE.

Stupid cap locks turning on randomly.

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You notice thats what 5 year olds say when they almost say a cuss word entirely.

Oh, btw, im just wondering, how old are you?

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So, were both the same age?

Seriously, your talking like a three year old.

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